Tag: instant

Local Man Considers Neighbour To Be His Mortal Enemy

WITHOUT any clear reasoning, and unable to cite a specific incident, one Dublin man has nevertheless stated that he considers his next door neighbour to be his mortal enemy. “The head on him like, just look at him,” Dave Crennan, a Killester based man, confirmed with WWN as he peered out his sitting room curtains,… Read more »

Google Unveils New Auto-Complete Feature For Your Thoughts

GOOGLE has unveiled a helpful tool that will bring an end to the laborious and onerous task typing search terms, general queries and websites into its search engines. The tech giant’s new Auto-Thought feature which was installed earlier today has transformed everyone’s phones, laptops and tablet devices by allowing the transposing of people’s thoughts directly… Read more »

BREAKING: John Delaney Still FAI President

NEWS has broken in the last few moments confirming that FAI president John Delaney is still president of the FAI, despite being John Delaney, WWN can confirm. Mr. Delaney, who makes €360,000 annually on top of an additional €300 allowance per day for some unknown reason, is expected to continue both his current roles as John Delaney and FAI president for… Read more »

Roy Keane Released Back Into Wild

THE football association of Ireland has taken Roy Keane out to the wilderness of rural Cork and released him back into the wild after five years in captivity as assistant to manager Martin O’Neill, whose term as Republic Of Ireland manager ended yesterday. Keane, long regarded as a threat to himself and those around him, had… Read more »