STRIKING UP uninvited conversation with WWN while we waited in line to order coffee, local man Gerard Lyons enthusiastically discussed how the news that Minister for Health Simon Harris intends to push for VAT to be removed from the price of condoms and menstrual cups would pave the way for a personal sex bonanza. “Ya… Read more »
THE administration of a big Supermacs the morning after a feed of drink is to be covered by the medical card following a ruling from the HSE, with plans to roll the scheme out to holders of private medical insurance policies set to follow in the near future too. The plan was formed following a… Read more »
THE advent of a superfast 5G on our shores presents the next generation with a whole slew of potentially fatal baseless health problems, including broadband-induced head cancer, gut rot, and liverwurst. To combat this, scientists PROBABLY ON THE SOROS PAYROLL have developed a 5G vaccine that will help inoculate our children and ourselves against the harmful… Read more »
CHANGES made to popular mindfulness app Hey Hey Calm Down There will require users to not only update their app, but also subscribe to a premium package if they want to continue their course of meditation and not be such a fucking whinge-bag all the time. The app, made by Waterford-based tech company Hardkore, has millions of… Read more »
WITH the announcement by minister for health Simon Harris of plans for 6 regional health areas within the HSE, Ireland is tantalisingly close to being just 30 rushed overhauls away from the health service not being in any better shape. “This is definetly going to work…probably,” an exhausted looking Simon Harris said, hoping the public and… Read more »
WITH PERSISTENT talk of proposed exclusion zones being implemented in an effort to reduce the abuse endured by women attending hospitals that provide abortion services, WWN looks at how such zones would work. While there are a number of proposals being considered, the department of health has whittled down the number of options available to… Read more »
“Oh, you’re feeling a little bit down after your gerbil died; here’s a prescription for some benzos that should keep you in a nice, vegetative state for the next few years,” Dr. Kevin Hoggan told his 5th such patient this week as we entered his surgery. Speaking to WWN, the general practitioner admitted to not knowing off hand… Read more »
AS the HSE continues to mull over the merits of medicinal cannabis, several long-term sufferers of illness that may benefit from the drug have started to wonder whether or not they will be able to avail of it, and when. The answer so far is simple; maybe, and sometime. Minister For Health Simon Harris has… Read more »
WE MEET a visibly worked up Minister for Health Simon Harris who is not best pleased and it’s easy to see why; 10,000 healthcare support staff are striking today in search of something called ‘decent pay’. “I’m pretty browned off to be honest, more browned off than toast that was left in a toaster a… Read more »
TIRED of having to read several articles to keep up to date with all the various crises in the HSE? Lucky for you, WWN have compiled this handy guide to keep you up to speed! Children’s Hospital Hopes that the woefully over-budget Children’s Hospital project would suddenly shed €500m in expenses and arrive on time… Read more »