Category: HEALTH

POLL: Will You Vaccinate Your Children Against 5G?

THE advent of a superfast 5G on our shores presents the next generation with a whole slew of potentially fatal baseless health problems, including broadband-induced head cancer, gut rot, and liverwurst. To combat this, scientists PROBABLY ON THE SOROS PAYROLL have developed a 5G vaccine that will help inoculate our children and ourselves against the harmful… Read more »

HSE Just 30 More Rushed Overhauls Away From Not Being Fixed

WITH the announcement by minister for health Simon Harris of plans for 6 regional health areas within the HSE, Ireland is tantalisingly close to being just 30 rushed overhauls away from the health service not being in any better shape. “This is definetly going to work…probably,” an exhausted looking Simon Harris said, hoping the public and… Read more »

How Exclusion Zones Around Hospitals Would Work

WITH PERSISTENT talk of proposed exclusion zones being implemented in an effort to reduce the abuse endured by women attending hospitals that provide abortion services, WWN looks at how such zones would work. While there are a number of proposals being considered, the department of health has whittled down the number of options available to… Read more »

GP Prescribing Benzos Like He’s On Commission

“Oh, you’re feeling a little bit down after your gerbil died; here’s a prescription for some benzos that should keep you in a nice, vegetative state for the next few years,” Dr. Kevin Hoggan told his 5th such patient this week as we entered his surgery. Speaking to WWN, the general practitioner admitted to not knowing off hand… Read more »