Deluded Utd Fan Thinks This Could Be The Beginning Of Something


DESPITE having some time to allow his blood pressure return to normal and the adrenaline coursing through his body to subside, local Manchester United fan Mick Nealey believes his team’s victory over Liverpool is only the beginning.

“Ah, you know there’s times you can just feel something brewing. Like when Van Gaal took over, or Mourinho or Ole,” said Nealey, who believed the decisive match winner Amad Diallo could blossom into a modern day Frederico Machedo if he keeps up this form.

Fresh from writing a follow up email to his boss bemoaning the fact he didn’t agree with Nealey’s opinion that the bank holiday Monday should have been suspended so he could abuse his Liverpool supporting colleagues in person, the 38-year-old found himself day-dreaming of better days to come.

“It’s like when Rang Ralfnick came in and I said we have the chance to lay the foundations of something, now there really is the foundations there for something special” added Nealey, who seemed unaware of the fact that simply piling foundations on top of foundations on top of foundations fails to build anything.

Nealey pointed out that only small adjustments and tweaks are needed to transform the Erik Ten Hag managed side into league and champion’s league contenders.

“We’re only talking a billion or two in the summer transfer window from Ineos, then an emergency panic spending spree of €500mn in the following January window before we’re the sort of side who doesn’t lose to Fulham at home,” beamed an excited Nealey.