Category: Football

WWN’s World Cup Recap

IN THE biggest grudge match since James Cordon vs some restaurant staff, Ghana and Uruguay faced off in Group H. Rolling back the years Luis Suarez put in a vintage performance only made possible by the fact he was fueled by pure hatred and a desire to troll Ghana. Awarded a penalty, Ghana had an… Read more »

WWN’s World Cup Recap

JAPAN’S winning goal and the resulting controversy was the craziest thing to happen last night up until Kanye West stepped into Alex Jones’ studio for a chat. The football cliche has been updated to ‘you can actually write off the Germans’ after two consecutive group stage exits at the World Cup. With Spain taking the… Read more »

WWN’s World Cup Recap

THE EVENING’S games saw Argentina face off against a Poland team who honestly played like scoring a goal would give them some horrific disease. The referee livened things up when he awarded Argentina a penalty in the most unjust awarding of something since Forrest Gump beat Pulp Fiction and Shawshank Redemption to Best Picture Oscar…. Read more »

WWN’s World Cup Recap

YESTERDAY’S World Cup games were sponsored by that realisation it’s been fairly shit and hosting it Qatar has killed your love for one of the very few things that brings you joy, and Budweiser. Group A saw Senegal earn a penalty when Ecuador’s Piero Hincapie was punished by the referee for simply spotting Ismaila’s Sarr’s… Read more »

Qatar Wouldn’t Have Bribed FIFA To Hold World Cup If It Knew People From Other Countries Would Turn Up

THE SUPREME COMMITTEE overseeing the running of the World Cup in Qatar have expressed their continued and unending shock and surprise at the fact that hosting the tournament involves people from a vast array of countries turning up. “At no point did we consider inviting the whole world to Qatar would involve people actually taking… Read more »

WWN’s World Cup Recap

THE FIRST two games of the day were so thrilling as to almost make you forget the World Cup is being held in Qatar. Serbia and Cameroon played out at a thrilling 3-3 draw but the game will be remembered for Vincent Aboubakar’s stunning goal. Finishing like a man who thought he was offside Aboubakar… Read more »

WWN’s World Cup Recap

YESTERDAY EVENING’S 7pm game was more anticipated than a Destiny Child’s reunion and saw Germany channel their inner Survivor against Spain. The first half saw Spain register more passes than Tommy Fury during an episode of Mastermind, spearheaded once again by Gavi and Pedri who were only 3 months old when the World Cup was… Read more »

WWN’s World Cup Recap

The result of the day saw Iran win 2-0 against a Welsh side that looked less potent than homeopathy. Irish fans couldn’t help but look on with envy and think had things been a little different in qualifying that could have been us being piss poor and losing to Iran at a World Cup. More… Read more »

WWN’s World Cup Recap

FIFA have won rare praise at the 2022 World Cup for agreeing to stage the more boring games at 10am and 1pm so people working and studying don’t feel like they’ve missed out on much. During their game with Cameroon Swiss fans made a bid to overtake the vuvuzelas as the most annoying noise creators… Read more »