Category: WORLD NEWS

Britain To Launch Its Own EU

STOCK markets across the world have been sent into a frenzy this afternoon as the UK announced it will launch its own European Union next year, aptly naming the new venture EU.2, WWN can confirm. Speaking outside Number 10 Downing Street, Prime Minister Boris Johnson detailed plans for a “bigger, stronger Europe”, calling on neighbours Ireland… Read more »

Britain’s Brexit Planning Enters ‘Comparing Merkel To Hitler’ Phase

FRESH from Brexit officially been upgraded from a ‘shit show’ to ‘a festival of faeces that never ends’, Britain’s planning has officially entered the ‘Germans are Nazis’ phase of successfully safeguarding Britain from the harmful consequences of a potentially devastating no deal Brexit. “Germans are Nazis innit,” explained head of PM Boris Johnson’s Lazy Xenophobia… Read more »

World Doing Its Best To Not Have Mental Image Of Boris Johnson Having Affair

AS more and more details emerge surrounding Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s affair with business woman Jennifer Arcuri, the public have issued a plea to have less and less details emerge surrounding Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s alleged affair with businesswoman Jennifer Arcuri. Stating emphatically that a politician having sexual relations with someone who they were subsequently giving… Read more »

British Soldier Has No Idea He’ll Soon Be Screaming At Elderly Belfast Woman To ‘Get Out Of The Fucking Car’

A BRITISH SOLDIER from Swindon is reportedly completely unaware he will be pointing a gun at an elderly woman in Belfast in the near future, demanding she vacate her vehicle in the moments preceding a tragic incident that will forever remain in the minds of people in Northern Ireland, but not anyone from England, and which… Read more »

We’re Just Using Greta Thunberg’s Image For Clicks Now

AFTER closely reviewing our engagement and click through conversion rates with our stats team, this publication is to just use Greta Thunberg’s image for ‘rage clicks’ now in the hopes of further generating our online advertising revenues, WWN can confirm. Admittedly, we could have used a headline that suggests she’s the voice of a generation, or indeed that she’s a… Read more »