“I’ll Live With This Shame Forever” Man Caught With Genuine TV Subscriptions

A LOCAL WATERFORD man has spoken of his profound shame after being caught red-handed paying full price for genuine, legal streaming and TV broadcasting services, WWN can reveal.

“A neighbour passed by the house just as the TV licence inspector was at the door praising me for having a TV licence,” explained Fintan Colgan, who was then outed by his neighbour in the estate WhatsApp group.

“It’s my kids I worry for, they’re going to get ‘your Da pays the licence fee’ insults day-in, day-out in school, that label doesn’t just wash off you,” Colgan said, as we sat in his sitting room with uninterrupted 1080hp quality TV playing effortlessly in the background.

Colgan is speaking out in the hope of giving other people the courage to admit to having an exorbitantly priced premium subscription to a TV provider.

“Well, that’s why I thought I was speaking out. I thought talking about it would lesson my shame but I… I think the shame is like the blood in veins, it’ll keep flowing around my body until the day I die,” added Colgan.

Colgan’s choice to pay for TV has had a knock on effect for some of his closest relationships.

“I don’t get the little in-jokes or phrases my mates use now, they spend 10 minutes explaining to each other what to do when your dodgy box lad gets caught, I feel left out. Just last week I caught my wife going over to her sisters just to watch a dodgy box. She said it gave her life meaning, doing something so wrong, she said she hates our normal boring life and needed to feel something, anything,” cried Colgan.

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