Category: HEALTH

Human Race To Sue God For Sciatic Nerve Design Flaw

LAWYERS for the human race have today started legal proceedings against God, the alleged creator of man over a series of design flaws in the human body. America’s biggest law firm, Latham & Watkins, are expected to sue God the almighty through the Vatican for a staggering 23 trillion euros, one of the biggest compensation claims… Read more »

Are You Eating Enough Silage?

STUDIES have shown that almost 100% of humans aren’t eating nearly enough silage, with scientists currently trying to evaluate the potential health risks if this trend continues. Silage, a hearty and warming food that is readily available, is normally fed to livestock in the winter as a way of keeping them from dying. However, a stunning… Read more »

HSE Spontaneously Combusts

THERE has been widespread shock and confusion at the news that Ireland’s national health executive, the HSE, has spontaneously combusted. News agencies learned earlier this morning that at precisely 5.34am, an intense searing sound was heard coming from every part of the HSE, before a huge boom echoed across the Nation. Eye witnesses described the… Read more »

It’s Official: A Gram Of Coke A Day Keeps The Doctor Away

A NEW study into the prevalence of cocaine use among Irish adults has found that moderate use of the drug has some astounding beneficial health factors, including increased tolerance to alcohol, a better sex life and can even eradicate the need for sleep in some subjects. The study, which followed the cocaine habits of 435 parents over a six… Read more »