-
Sepp Blatter Announced As New FAI CEO
THE FAI turned to Sepp Blatter after their favoured candidate John Foley, formerly of Athletics Ireland, withdrew himself from consideration ... -
Prince Harry Apprehensive After Getting Andrew For Secret Santa
THE Duke Of Sussex emitted an audible ‘oh for fuck sake’ at this morning’s annual Kris Kringle draw in Buckingham ... -
Murphy And Harris Point At Each Other And Shout “Housepital” At Same Time
MINISTER For Health Simon Harris and Minister For Housing Eoghan Murphy are said to be skipping around Leinster House in ... -
Greta Thunberg Sinks Five Oil Tankers & Hijacks Two Merchant Ships Loaded With Plastic During ...
Acting with truly inspiring cruelty and vengeance despite her young age, Greta Thunberg has already downed five tankers and hijacked ... -
London Bridge Attacker Had “I Love Jeremy Corbyn” Tattoo, Confirms Johnson
BRITISH Prime Minister Boris Johnson has called a press conference in which he confirmed that the man who carried out ... -
GAA To Become Joyless Charismatic Void Without Jim Gavin
SUPPORTERS who complained of football becoming predictably boring and boringly predictable could always rely on the one saving grace the ... -
Fine Gael Rethink Strategy Of Endorsing Ignorant Fools
SENIOR FINE GAEL party figures are looking into completely overhauling their candidate selection process which currently sees them only consider ... -
Buckingham Palace Closed Due To Floods Of Sweat
THE ROYAL residence has been damaged in a flash flood caused by the sudden and violent expulsion of unprecedented volumes ... -
Nation Expresses Disgust As Lisa Smith Granted “Fair Trial”
LARGE groups of Irish citizens have expressed disgust at the fact that suspected ISIS member Lisa Smith is to be ... -
Farmer In Tractor Only Getting Back From Protest Now
HOLDING up a long stream of traffic and travelling at a painful 34 kilometers per hour, local farmer Danny Rice ...