Tag: instant

Armed TV Licence Enforcers To Be Deployed Nationwide

A CRACK team of specially trained TV licence inspectors are to be deployed in a bid to recoup the €40m in unpaid fees every year, Communications Minister Denis Naughten has confirmed. ‘TV licence enforcers’ are to be recruited and trained alongside the Garda special response team, and will be equipped with military grade automatic weapons and body armour… Read more »

“Fuck Terrorism” Confirms Everyone

AS THE DEPRESSINGLY familiar scenes from the latest attack on innocent civilians etched itself into the minds of people, joining other incidents and memories sadly too easy to recall, every right minded person concluded that terrorism ‘can get fucked’. “Yeah, fuck terrorism,” everyone confirmed, with a conviction and defiance that suggested their capacity to remain… Read more »

Parents Urged To Monitor Kids Internet Use If They Want To Know Where All The Good Porn Is

WITH almost every teenager in the country owning their very own smartphone with numerous social media apps at their disposal, there’s never been a greater risk of them accessing debasing, depraved pornography; something that parents should be acutely aware of if they’re bored of the same old smut and need to find something racier. A… Read more »

Local Man Wears Hats Now

ALTHOUGH they initially dismissed the wearing of hats as a passing fad or a byproduct of the cold weather, friends of one local Waterford man are today coming to terms with the fact that their pal wears hats now, and there’s nothing they can do about it. Sean Carolan, 36, was never known to friends… Read more »

“Squatters’ Rights” Shouts Kenny As He Barricades Himself Into Taoiseach’s Office

RACING through the corridors of Leinster House pursued on foot by Simon Coveney and Leo Varadkar, Enda Kenny reached the Taoiseach’s office and immediately declared “squatters’ rights” at the top of his lungs as he tried to close the door behind him. The young ministers had attempted to discuss Kenny’s leadership intentions with him, in… Read more »