Category: POLITICS

Maternity Hospital Will Respect Rights Of The Mother ‘If She’s Married’, Confirms Spokesnun

THE Sisters of Charity have confirmed that the new €300 million national maternity hospital will always respect the rights of the mother and the baby, “as long as she’s married”, a spokesnun told WWN today. Sister Gertrude Dingleberry, a member of one of 18 religious orders that were included in the €1.5 billion redress scheme with the State… Read more »

Public Sector Unions Would Also Like A Pony

PAY restorations totalling €1.4 billion are just some of the outlandish demands coming from a union representing civil servants after nearly 10 years of cuts and pay freezes according to the government, with other requests including a pony, 30 more holidays during the year, free Netflix, and Andrex toilet roll in the jacks. The requests… Read more »

“This Is How You Politics, Bitches!”

BRITISH Prime Minister Theresa May has called out fellow political leaders today after announcing a snap election in a bid to give her more power when it comes to dealing with Europe, insisting that “this is how you politics, bitches!” Speaking outside number 10 Downing Street yesterday morning, the Conservative party leader said she decided to call the surprise election… Read more »

“Fuck Back To Malta And Stop Annoying Us” High Court Tells O’Brien

BUSINESSMAN Denis O’Brien has been told by the high court to “fuck back to Malta” after losing his action over statements made in the Dáil about his banking affairs, WWN can confirm. Ms Justice Ursula Rafferty today dismissed the businessman’s action, stating that Dáil utterances are protected from judicial condemnation and court interference, and told O’Brien to stop… Read more »