If Home Alone Happened In Real Life

HOME Alone tells the high-jinx filled story of the McCallister family, who accidentally go on holidays without their 8-year-old son Kevin, who has to fend off a pair of burglars until his folks land home for an emotional reunion on Christmas Day. Watching Home Alone nearly 30 years after its release, it’s hard to imagine how… Read more »

Hollywood Actress Marilyn Monroe Passes Away Aged 92

HOLLYWOOD movie icon and singer Norma Jean Baker aka Marilyn Monroe, who was best known for her roles in Some Like It Hot and Monkey Business, passed away in her sleep at her East Florida home last night, WWN has learned. The Associated Press reports that Monroe died after a battle with a short illness, leaving behind her three children, Jack, Robert… Read more »

Seeking Professional Help After Admitting You’d Fuck Beast From Beauty & The Beast

KNOWN as ‘Beast-feasters’ in their secret online communities, women and men gather on a daily basis in dark corners of the internet to discuss the ‘fuck-a-bility’ of the titular Beast from Disney’s 1991 animated classic Beauty and the Beast. Today, this stops. Are you one of the thousands of Beast lusting degenerates out there, waxing… Read more »

Indiana Jones Movies Banned From TV Over Concerns They Promote Violence Against Nazis

THE much-loved Indiana Jones series of movies will be absent from TV screens this Christmas, after several far-right groups claimed that the whip-cracking archaeological adventures paint the Nazi party in an incredibly bad light, and may incite hatred and violence against the organisation. Although the movies starring Harrison Ford have featured Dr. Henry ‘Indiana’ Jones… Read more »

“Beckham Kissing Daughter Made Me Feel Funny Inside”

SPEAKING out on his latest unwanted comments, British journalist and television presenter Piers Morgan has admitted that David Beckham’s Instagram snap of himself innocently kissing his own daughter made him “feel funny inside”, forcing Morgan to insinuate things set deep within his own warped subconscious. Morgan, who oversaw phone hacking of celebrities and people of interest, and ran fabricated… Read more »

5 Things We Want Ralph To Wreck Next

WRECK-IT Ralph returns to our screens shortly, this time inadvertently ‘breaking the internet’ in a hilarious sequel to the beloved first movie. But why stop there? What’s in store for Ralph in the future? With the internet smashed, here’s five more things we’d like Ralph to turn his smash-happy hands to… 1) Donuts We like… Read more »