Category: POLITICS

Today In Government Apologies: Selling Babies

THE government has spun it’s ‘big wheel o’ apologies’ and landed on ‘illegal birth registrations’, the fancy new term that it has coined for the practice of the Catholic Church selling babies to wealthy families and doctoring the paperwork to make everything seem legit and the State turning an ignorant eye. As such, the Minister… Read more »

DUP Won’t Nominate Deputy First Minister Unless British Government Buys Them Pony

SENDING SHOCKWAVES through the political world, DUP leader Jeffrey Donaldson has suggested the unthinkable: his party will bring down the Stormont before it even has a chance to form because it’s not happy that the Northern Ireland protocol, which his party made inevitable through its advocating for Brexit, still exists. “We won’t nominate a deputy… Read more »

What A Sinn Féin First Minister Means According To The Fevered Nightmares Of Arlene Foster

TECHNICALLY you are already breaking the law by attempting to read this article in English if you’re resident in Northern Ireland as ‘curry my yogurt’ Irish is the new official language, as outlined in Arlene Foster’s fevered dreams. Using special sectarian science WWN has obtained the nightmares of Arléné Ní Fóstér and can reveal just… Read more »

What’s Going On With The New National Maternity Hospital And Why Are People Unhappy?

CONTROVERSY over building the new national maternity hospital on the grounds of St Vincents, which is owned by the Sisters of Charity, rumbles on with questions remaining over governance and the possible influence a religious institution will have over maternity care. In an effort to clear everything up and put the public at ease a… Read more »

Here Are The DUP’s Last Minute Election Promises

FACING the risk of Sinn Féin becoming the largest party after the Assembly elections on the 5th of May, a desperate DUP leader Jeffrey Donaldson has begun making huge vote-swaying pledges and promises in a bid to coax people into voting for his beleaguered party. Responding to an election which has been dominated by cost… Read more »

America Considering Invading America

THERE IS growing evidence that America is mobilising military forces off its own coasts in a bid to rescue its citizens from America. The news comes as the Supreme Court, once viewed an independent institution free from political interference, issued a leaked opinion which would see abortion outlawed overnight, undoing 50 years of progress and… Read more »