AFTER being asked by assembled media if he needed to ‘rehabilitate’ his image upon his reentry into Fianna Fáil and Irish political life, Bertie Ahern confirmed that he accepts the Irish public’s apology for how they wronged him. “I wholeheartedly accept the apology. It was very moving to see the crowds line the streets and… Read more »
IRELAND’S leading craven bollocks and human brown envelope Bertie Ahern has sensationally been readmitted to Fianna Fáil, after members heard the former Taoiseach and current disgrace had said he hasn’t changed in anyway whatsoever and still retains the moral compass of a pyramid scheme. “What a relief, once I heard he was still the same… Read more »
THE COALITION government has hit new dizzying heights of ‘surely this will collapse the government?’ this week after unveiling plans to exclude 24,000 survivors of Mother and Baby Homes from a redress scheme because hey, they probably haven’t suffered enough trauma in their lives. Coupled with doubling down on their defence of an indefensible legal… Read more »
IT’S important to challenge the mind and remain mentally agile, and what better way to test your memory skills than by trying to memorise the list of TDs who voted in favour of legislation that would exclude 24,000 survivors of Mother & Baby Homes from a redress scheme. Here’s a challenge – don’t just memorise… Read more »
A BREAKTHROUGH development that could see the end of Brexit hostility between the EU and UK on the subject of the Northern Ireland Protocol has been reached, again. This will be the third, possibly fourth maybe ninth time (who’s counting) that the issue of goods checks between Britain and the island of Ireland will have… Read more »
THE DEPARTMENT of the Taoiseach has today sought to correct the public’s silly reaction to the news of the legal strategy pursued by the State as it sought to deny compensation to those illegally overcharged for public nursing homes. “Oh, you didn’t know the State’s primary function is to fuck you over and then fight… Read more »
WITH a large section of the general public concluding ‘that sounds like organised crime’ after learning successive governments and civil servants knowingly blocked as much as €12bn in refunds to the public for illegal nursing home charges in a secret plot, politicians past and present are trying desperately to get through to their solicitors. A… Read more »
TGIF, are we right? It’s nearly wine o’clock and the weekend couldn’t come soon enough. Positive attitude, blessed with gratitude. In the ‘negatives’ column however is the news that as the Government’s Housing for All policy fails on a variety of targets, a report has revealed 62,000 new units need to be built each year… Read more »
AFTER carrying out the most basic and rudimentary work, the nation’s media can confirm it turns out every single political party in Ireland is incapable of adhering to the rules governing political donations and declarations. “Yeah turns out whether it’s not bothering to pay invoices to a business in Sinn Féin’s case, Paschal’s sudden memory… Read more »
“POLITICIANS these days, wha?” said former Taoiseach Bertie Ahern, slapping his forehead in a bid exaggerate his disbelief. “An undeclared/record subsequently corrected political donation of €1,400 from a friend who has received €8.7mn in government business and sits on the board of the Land Development Agency? Pathetic, baby infants stuff, we were Champion’s League level… Read more »