Category: LOCAL NEWS

Dundalk Woman Thought She Was Joining ASOS

AS the country struggles to process what could have been going on in the mind of captured ISIS bride Lisa Smith, some commentators have surmised that the Dundalk woman must have mistakenly joined the hated terror group ISIS while under the impression that she was joining the popular online fashion retailer ASOS. Former Air Corp… Read more »

Media Weeps As Last ISIS Stronghold Falls

DELEGATES from the world’s media have offered a 21-pen salute to the gallant men and women of ISIS, in a moving ceremony to mark the fall of the last stronghold of the terrorist organisation. With the last members of the Caliphate holed up in a desperate, hopeless siege in Syria, journalists and editors from the biggest news outlets… Read more »

Israeli War Crimes < Eurovision

RTÉ have urged the country not to bother looking into the litany of atrocities carried out by the Israeli government against the people of Palestine between now and the Eurovision Song Contest in Tel Aviv on May 16th, as they may dampen the nation’s enthusiasm for catchy tunes and a dazzling stage show. The statement… Read more »

Local Facebook Community Group Full Of Fucking Whingers

A REPORT into local Facebook community pages and groups has found that the vast majority of members are complete fucking whingers that seem to have nothing better to do than ‘nitpick at every available moment of their sad and miserable lives’. Studying over 10,000 individual community groups across the country, the Facebook in-house report found that the… Read more »