THE UK’s former health secretary, fired not for presiding over a response to Covid-19 so disastrous it would make a Death Eater envious but for carrying out an affair on the job, has secured a top UN position charged with helping Africa’s economic recovery from the global pandemic. “Oh flip it, I’ve done it again,”… Read more »
US PRESIDENT Joe Biden has condemned Israeli airstrikes on Palestinians civilians which has resulted in the deaths of children in the strongest possible terms by urging Israel to use its annual US military aid of $3.8bn for ‘nice things’ only. “When we gave you that military aid with no strings attached and our implicit support… Read more »
FRUSTRATED by yet more tales of stilted vaccine rollout in the form of news that Ireland’s projected first quarter vaccine deliveries will actually be more than 50% below initial estimates, the Irish public has taken drastic action. Wrestling all vaccine rollout responsibilities from out of the hands of idle, inefficient and excuse making government officials,… Read more »
A LOCAL WATERFORD based loser has no idea how stupid he appears to other people as he continues to display a predisposition to offering a helping hand to all and sundry in his community. Matt Harty, is often seen going for walks armed with a plastic bag so he can pick up litter, as well… Read more »
A NUMBER of Loyalist paramilitary groups have written a really rather crossly-worded letter to the prime minister of Britain expressing their dismay at the ongoing Northern Ireland Protocol issues, while also withdrawing their support for the Good Friday Agreement, more or less, there’s a few bits in there they ‘want to hang on to’. “Mr…. Read more »
ENVIOUS social media users from across the world have expressed their palpable envy for Australians’ news-free Facebook experience. “Wow, lucky bastards; no crazy aunt arguing with you under the 50 racist Daily Mail articles she’s posted, no old school friend sharing anti-vaxx conspiracy theories. Those Aussies are living the dream,” confirmed one social media user… Read more »
WITH more and more evidence emerging regarding the effectiveness of mixing Coronavirus vaccines, the Health Service Executive of Ireland has called on out-of-work bar staff to come forward to help the department mix different variations at their labs. “We figured we could kill two birds with the one stone and try and give back to… Read more »
THE HSE has assured the country that all over-70s will have received their first dose of vaccinations by mid-April, a mere two to three weeks after the original estimated date of the ‘end of March’ and a probably two to three months before the actual completion date, WWN can report. “No, we can’t give you… Read more »
A COUNTY Waterford man has admitted today that he misses kicking the face off strangers outside pubs and chippers in the early morning, stating he would give anything for a good old-fashioned row right now, WWN reports. Jayo Lonergan, who has 57 convictions ranging from assault to drug dealing, said he’d ‘gladly dance on someone’s… Read more »
LOCAL man William Farnhill has added ‘swanky car’ to the list of things he doesn’t like about the Eastern European lad who moved in up the road from him, adding that it ‘doesn’t seem right’ that someone who hasn’t lived in Waterford for his whole life should be able to afford a 131 Nissan Qashqai… Read more »