THE LETHAL Portuguese man-of-war jellyfish known as ‘Manny’ has had some fairly hairy benders in his time, but even he admits that waking up on a Tramore beach with no idea as to how he got there was ‘pretty fucking intense’. Manny, who had been drinking with a shoal of his fellow stingy hydrozoans for a week straight,… Read more »
WITHOUT a single thought for their own safety, Waterford parents Michael and Janet Philpens have dashed out into the darkness of a rain-lashed night to collect 9 different types of leaf, which their 9-year-old son Eamon has just casually informed them that he needed for morning. “You head that way, there’s an oak tree beside… Read more »
THERE have been 45 presidents in the history of the United States, and it’d take a serious scholar of history to be able to name them all! How well would you do if you were put to the test? Let’s find out! Here’s an easy one to start with: That’s right, it’s George W. Bush,… Read more »
HOMELESS? In the market for a city-centre location that would be the envy of any apartment-seeker if it had walls, a door, warmth, comfort or security? Well, WWN Property may have just the pad for you. Located just off the city’s bustling St. Stephen’s Green area, this stunning one-bedroom doorway would suit any single homeless… Read more »
GREEN party leader Eamon Ryan has called on the government to implement new laws which will force manufacturers to make cars out of living bees, WWN has learned. Ryan said bee cars will be the new wave of environmentally friendly motor vehicles and will also help promote pollination across the country. “Their wings will help propel the… Read more »
STOCK markets across the world have been sent into a frenzy this afternoon as the UK announced it will launch its own European Union next year, aptly naming the new venture EU.2, WWN can confirm. Speaking outside Number 10 Downing Street, Prime Minister Boris Johnson detailed plans for a “bigger, stronger Europe”, calling on neighbours Ireland… Read more »
FROM the bowels of the Pentagon to the hallways of the White House, it’s all anyone can talk about. And who can blame them? With Trump pulling support for Kurdish rebels and paving the way for the slaughter of the very people who fought to defeat ISIS, it’s never been more fun for politicians and… Read more »
DUBLIN based career criminals have come out in force today to defend their good name and distance themselves from accusations that they accepted payments from ‘corrupt’ city councils and developers to protect sites from anti-social behaviour and theft. “I couldn’t sleep a wink last night after I heard what they were saying about us,” said Dublin criminal… Read more »
STUCK for a Halloween costume this year? One enterprising Waterford party company may have the answer for you, with a number of politically themed (but still sexy!) Halloween outfits ranging from Sexy No-Deal Brexit to Sexy Saudi Drone Strike to choose from. Guaranteed to put a smile on the faces of your party guests while… Read more »
BRITISH archaeologists excavating Silbury Hill at the ancient site of Stonehenge have today unearthed what is believed to be the skeletal remains of 3,000-year-old teletubby, placing the extinction of the humanoid race even later than previously thought. During a routine dig, archaeologists working under Professor Gareth Montini of Oxford University discovered an unusually enlarged skull in a mounded area near Stonehenge,… Read more »