Tag: brexit

Brexit Success As Britain Sign Trade Deal With Venus

THE CONSERVATIVE government is today hailing yet another Brexit breakthrough with the announcement that they have signed a ‘win-win’ trade deal with newly discovered possible signs of life on the economic powerhouse of planet Venus. “This is a triumph for Brexit Britain, today we have signed a trade deal which will see Britain import, tariff… Read more »

Brexit Chaos A Welcome Relief

FOLLOWING months of Coronavirus saturated news seeping into every single pore of media news bodies, Britain, Ireland and the remaining handful of Europeans who care exhaled in unison at a familiar pre-Covid era news story: the UK once again making the centrefold of the world’s latest issue of Fuck Up magazine. In a suspected attempt… Read more »

Heartbreak As Brits Laughing At Us Now

IRELAND’S coveted spot on the list of countries able to point at Britain and laugh may be in jeopardy today following a number of embarrassing gaffes and blunders by the Irish political establishment which have eroded our moral superiority figures for 2020. Although public smugness rode high on a wave of Britain-based mockery following the… Read more »

Johnson Announces Fiancé Pregnant With First Child He Cares About

SEVERAL battle-hardened former war journalists were forced to leave a press conference earlier this morning after falling ill, as Prime Minister Boris Johnson went into excruciating, intimate detail about how he gave his girlfriend Carrie Symonds ‘a gosh darn good knocking up’. Johnson, 55, and Symonds, 24 years younger than that, had announced their pregnancy… Read more »

UK’s New Immigration Points System Revealed

AN AUSTRALIAN style ‘points based system’ for immigration is set to be implemented in a post-Brexit Britain, Boris Johnson’s government has revealed. Far from being a worryingly predictable development that could see a dramatic shortage in so-called low-skilled workers, such as nurses and carers, that could serve as a sucker punch to a beleaguered economy,… Read more »

Unified Ireland: The Big Questions

ALTHOUGH a new government has yet to be formed from the aftermath of GE2020, a freshly-invigorated and triumphant Sinn Féin have already begun to lay the groundwork for a Unity Referendum; an all-island poll to gauge the desire to finally reunite Northern Ireland with the Republic, a question that has been brewing in the four… Read more »