ORIGINALLY bought as some sort of exercise regime or weight training program or something or other, the kettlebell sat in the home of Dublin man Cathal McHogan has proved to be an incredibly useful thing to have about the house, WWN can report. “It’s mad, I don’t even remember buying them!” laughed the 37-year-old, pushing… Read more »
“DON’T dress for the lockdown you’re in, dress for the lockdown you’d like to be in” said Waterford woman Sheila McTavert this morning, changing out of her ‘nighttime’ pajamas and into her ‘daytime’ pajamas. McTavert, 32, opted for a fresh pair of PJs this morning having spent the majority of last week working from home… Read more »
THE long-running Alien franchise returns to screens this summer with a stunning new instalment that re-imagines the sci-fi horror masterpiece as a more grounded, Earth-based take featuring veteran actor and activist Mia Farrow. “We needed someone who could bring that sense of strength in the face of grotesque adversity, the essence of a woman who… Read more »
ALREADY overstaying his welcome here on earth, media mogul Rupert Murdoch’s current life status remains in the balance again this year as opposite factions of the universe refuse to take him post-death. A spokes demon for hell confirmed the sanctity where evil souls are subjected to punitive suffering, often torture, as eternal punishment after death… Read more »
RESIDENTS in the Republic of Ireland have en masse made their first tentative steps into exploring a permanent move to Northern Ireland to coincide with the probable return of pubs in line with Boris Johnson’s recently announced plans for England, WWN has learned. Speeding through Garda checkpoints only to find themselves caught up in miles… Read more »
SPEAKING outside his south Dublin home today, veteran broadcaster Pat Kenny has vowed the total annihilation of his latest land enemy developer Bartra Properties, stating he is locked and loaded and ready to roll. “If these motherfuckers want a land war, I’ll give them a land war to end all land wars,” voiced Pat, brandishing… Read more »
WITH both the UK and the Republic of Ireland outlining their roadmap out of Covid lockdown in the past few days, a committee of border counties will now sit down and work out what the next few months look like for them in terms of ‘living with covid’. Delegates from Donegal, Tyrone, Fermanagh, Derry, Armagh,… Read more »
RELIEVED that 15-time major winner Tiger Woods’ suffered multiple fractures in his ankle following a crash yesterday but avoiding life threatening injuries, there was further welcome news for golf fans as Woods emerged from UCLA medical centre showing off his new experimental golf-club-for-a-leg surgery. Famous for battling through countless injuries and trying to eek out… Read more »
THE TAOISEACH took to the airwaves to get the Nation’s hopes down, and outline ‘Living With Covid’ version 4578, but just what’s in the plan? Firstly, rather than quote a Hollywood movie like his predecessor, Taoiseach Martin chose instead to re-enact in full the scene from Misery where Kathy Bates takes a sledgehammer to James… Read more »
REACTING to the combination of ongoing abysmal communication by the government and the fact lockdown is to be extended by a minimum of 6 weeks, the Irish public has confirmed it has officially been driven demented. “The Taoiseach’s probably on the TV now to tell us what we’ve already known for a week because the… Read more »