CLAIMS made by the Government that education funding in Budget 2021 will see the average size of primary schools classes reduced by one to 24 pupils per class, is welcome if confusing news for Galway native and teacher in an overcrowded classroom of 35 adorable little shits that’d test the patience of a saint, Marie… Read more »
WHILE the Minister for Education, Norma Foley, announced some 7,200 Leaving Cert students have been affected by an error in the calculated grading system, it also emerged the coalition government should have been awarded an ‘F’ in politics. Despite instances of copying answers, attempting resitting of tests and countless oral and aural exams, the coalition… Read more »
INCORRIGIBLE and mischievous secondary school students fond of quick-witted jokes and scatalogical based humour have been issued a warning by all teachers who have enough to be dealing with what with working during a pandemic, WWN can report. All fever-based joshing and cries of ‘Miss, miss, miss is this a funeral home ‘cus there’s some… Read more »
FOLLOWING the release of the CAO points today, the Dept. of Education is to set off on a well-earned journey of self-discovery to “ya know, just really figure out who I am” after a particularly trying and demanding year of flawlessly overseeing Irish education. “Like OMG – goodbye stress, we’ve earned it. Maybe a yoga… Read more »
WITH the lines to Joe Duffy jammed, local Dublin based mother Julianne Montgomery was left with no option but to report a ‘highly sophisticated computer algorithm based theft’ of her son’s hopes and dreams to the gardaí, WWN can reveal. “I said I’d like to report a crime and no, I’m not raising my voice,”… Read more »
TRIUMPHANT Waterford youth Alan Harrison celebrated his Leaving Cert results with his classmates last night, completely oblivious to the fact that this is the top of life’s mountain with only decades of jagged rocks to follow. Harrison was congratulated earlier by both of his alive-right-now parents after receiving more than enough points for his dream… Read more »
RATHER than rushing to congratulate their younger sister Gráinne on her solid 500 points showing in this year’s Leaving Cert, older siblings Cormac (370 points) and Niamh (480 points) have labeled it as ‘not a real Leaving’. In a sign that the pandemic has left some things unchanged, Cormac and Niamh spent the morning passive… Read more »
BACK TO SCHOOL pictures on social media have become the new fad in keeping up with the Joneses, evolving from simple front door snaps of children heading back to school, to a new form of ‘look at my beautiful house interior’. WWN looks at the 5 best photogenic fireplaces to stick your back to school… Read more »
FAILING TO hide her annoyance at the fact her youngest child has his school hazmat suit ruined three days into the school year, local mother Rachel Keeley’s patience is being tested to its limits. “What did I tell you? No knee slides,” Keeley said through gritted teeth which grasped thread she was using to sow… Read more »
PARENTS concerned about safety measures in their kids’ schools have angrily turned to the teachers and principals for answers, as if education professionals have been shown some masterful plan by the government but are just keeping it to themselves. With schools being one of the first institutions to be closed when the pandemic hit our… Read more »