AS a shortage of affordable student accommodation takes the government by surprise in much the same way absolutely everything else does, homeowners have been urged to rent rooms to students while offering them a number of other services students might be interested in.
The Department of Further Education clarified that while provision of accommodation for students is working flawlessly, is there any chance you could stick a few bunk beds in your shed, preferably along with a semester’s worth of pot noodles?
“With points skyrocketing the last few years and a higher demand for college places we’re looking for homeowners to start their own third level institutions and also something called ‘career guidance and student support services’ no idea what that is,” said a Department of Further Education spokesperson.
“And look it, while we have ye if you have another bed could you give it to your local A&E, we’re running out of trolleys,” chimed in a Department for Health spokesperson, who appeared out of nowhere.
“Oh, before we go, if any of you are experts in the provision of child disability care and services, you’d be doing us a big favour by treating some of the 110,000 kids on a waiting list, sound,” added the DoH.
The news of a search for solutions to accommodation shortages comes as the Tánaiste Leo Varadkar revealed for the first time in an exclusive interview with a media outlet “y’know, yeah maybe it is kind of fucked up that working people can’t afford a home, someone should really do something about that”.