PEOPLE who think that wind farms are the solution to our energy needs haven’t considered their potentially lethal side effects, according to a new report released by some of the world’s gas and oil giants. During a press conference we attended, we heard that anyone arguing for renewable energy sources should consider the following: 1)… Read more »
A NEW consumer study has found that burning euros to heat your home is actually 25% cheaper than consuming oil and gas, WWN reports. Simply extracting all your cold hard cash from the bank, stacking it into a neat pile in a fireplace and setting it all a light will keep tens of thousands of… Read more »
AT A lunch catch up amongst industry peers, a group of Irish developers were left in stitches after one developer told an anecdote about pranking the Minister for Housing by producing a 58-page report which claimed house prices could fall if gardens of future housing developments were reduced by 20% in size. “It feels cruel… Read more »
AS part of WWN’s Opinions series, we give a platform to people we really shouldn’t. This week, it’s the turn of Bishop Cornelius Byle who has some thoughts on the news that soon contraception will be free for women between the ages of 17 and 25. While Christian science has confirmed the only reason any… Read more »
EXHAUSTED Meta staff recovering from a 7-hour briefing primarily made up of founder Mark Zuckerberg screaming the word ‘reels’ over and over again at them are said to be concerned for their futures as the 38-year-old becomes more and more unhinged over the fact young people are flocking to rival platforms. “Fair enough, Facebook started… Read more »
THE nation has been described as ‘flabbergasted’ after their public outcry over AIB’s decision to go cashless actually caused the bank to reverse their stance, prompting the question; what else could we get if we kicked off? 1) How about that bailout? All told, Ireland bailed out the banks (including AIB) to the tune of… Read more »
BUSINESSES and tradespeople across the country are reassessing the services they provide in the wake of AIB’s decision to implement a cashless policy in their branches, with many stating that they ‘didn’t realise’ that they could stop doing the one thing people needed from them and yet somehow still remain in business. Settling off a… Read more »
A RECENT appraisal of Elon Musk related news stories, tweets and aborted business takeovers has revealed that the billionaire was much easier to stomach when his Neuralink company was killing monkeys as part of an attempt to put microchips in their brains. “I’ve sworn off Twitter, every day it’s the same parade of embarrassing try-hard… Read more »
AIB HAVE confirmed that a dedicated team of rabid dogs specialising in a lack of customer service will be on hand to dissuade pensioners from trying to access their local bank branches, WWN can report. “From 30 September & 21 October 2022, some of our branches will no longer offer cash and cheque services at… Read more »
