Category: BUSINESS

Nation’s Last Available Plumber Dies

THERE was bad news on the home improvements front for anyone today as the last plumbing contractor in Ireland with any availability this side of Christmas passed away following a short illness, leaving thousands of homes with no chance of getting a few jobs done around the house. “The death has occurred of Peter Hanlon,… Read more »

Energy Company Morals Downgraded To ‘Banking’

MORAL RATINGS Agency Dooleys have downgraded Irish energy suppliers to a ‘banking level’ yesterday after yet more companies increased their prices for the umpteenth time this year, finally forcing the government to intervene. “We’re going to make suppliers hand out free Vaseline with each bill in the hopes it makes it easier on customers being… Read more »

LEGO Store Opening Delayed After Builders Lose Piece

DISASTER struck at the planned opening of Ireland’s first ever LEGO store on Grafton St after structural engineers failed to locate one piece which the LEGO booklet stats should clearly be there but remains missing. Parents queuing outside with their children who they were clearly using as a smokescreen for their own obsession with building… Read more »