KENNETH Pellan has totted up in his head how long it’s been since he watched the 1988 Brat Pack western Young Guns after noticing it while scrolling through Netflix and holy Christ, it’s been at least 30 years. “Fuck, I’m old,” sighed 45-year old Pellan before stating that he must watch the movie, once considered… Read more »
SCIENTISTS are no closer to understanding how there’s always 45 minutes left in whatever movie you’re watching every time you check the progress bar, regardless of how long the movie is overall, or your thoughts on its quality one way or the other. “It doesn’t seem to matter whether or not you’re enjoying the movie,… Read more »
CONSIDER this your last warning. If you read beyond this point it could have a major impact of your Spotify playlists and your Netflix watchlist. John Lennon Beat his first wife Cynthia Lennon. You might not be able to hear this over the sound of you performing some mental gymnastics to talk around this, but… Read more »
HELLO dear readers, the day we feared is upon us. Foolishly we laughed in everyone’s faces when they warned us of such things. You’ve taken to your bed, not eating or drank water since the trailer emerged, you are bereft, but fear not WWN is here to give you the strength to carry on. Here’s… Read more »
A FRENCH man considered very good at them French movies has passed away at the age of 91. Revered by your one friend who watches them French ones for reasons other than the faint possibility of some nudity, has stated yer man was quare good and influential. Despite not directing even one Marvel movie and… Read more »
A WATERFORD couple’s date night has been temporarily halted after one of the pair insisted that they’re sitting across the restaurant from a person who may or may not be an actor who may or may not have been in something, WWN can report. “Don’t look, don’t look, don’t look, but that’s definitely your man…. Read more »
CROWD footage from the 79th Venice Film Festival that appears to show popstar-turned-actor Harry Styles spitting on his ‘Don’t Worry Darling’ co-star Chris Pine has ground worldwide production to a halt for the rest of the day, perhaps even the week. In dramatic scenes reminiscent of Will Smith slapping Chris Rock at the Oscars earlier… Read more »
THE MOST ANTICIPATED movie since the medium of film was invented. Finally, Michael Flatley’s magnum opus has hit the screens. WWN was there to capture the very first audience reactions ahead of ‘Blackbird’ becoming the highest grossing movie of all time: “I have seen the face of God” – Elaine 55, Dublin. “I liked how… Read more »
THE failure of the government to roll out high-speed broadband across the country has been a bone of contention for many, but it has been a lifeline for the proprietor of the country’s last remaining branch of Xtra-Vision, tucked away in the wilds of Mayo. “While the rest of the country has embraced streaming, the… Read more »
THE SEEMINGLY cancel-proof star of the upcoming superhero movie ‘The Flash’, Ezra Miller has been a mainstay in news headlines recently as Miller attempts to break the world record for one-person crime spree shenanigans. Such is the sheer volume of Miller’s misdeeds and the rumour mill that surrounds such craziness it can be hard to… Read more »