APOLOGIES have been extended to Ukrainian civilians currently on the receiving end of the most heinous and inhumane war crimes, but Will Smith just fucking slapped Chris Rock across the face, we kid you not! “All high-minded opinion pieces, all Tiktok explainers, all 150-tweet Twitter threads, all comment section arguments will solely be focusing on… Read more »
FULL time mad bastard Thomas Cruise has clung onto planes, he’s clung onto trains, he’s even clung onto things in Bahrain. But for Mission Impossible 7, the veteran actor will tackle his most reckless stunt yet; offering an opinion on crypto currency and non-fungible tokens. Although little is known about the plot of MI:7 and… Read more »
WELL WISHERS were out in force on local actor Damien Doverand’s Instagram page as the actor revealed he had secured his ‘dream role’ in a play he has written, which he will also direct and produce. “Amazing news, Damien, best of luck!” wrote one of Doverand’s friends, responding to the news that he will take… Read more »
TWO of the world’s foremost experts in dressing up as ‘the loud obnoxious old women’ stereotype have come together for a cross-over movie that both parties are excited about, even if neither have really heard of each other. Believing that what the world needed more than anything else at this time was a movie featuring… Read more »
THE HOME of newly single Hollywood star Jason Momoa resembles the heavily militarised US diplomatic greenzone as police continue to struggle in their attempts to keep desperate single women from scaling the walls of his home. Some 106 officers have been pushing back thousands of women from attempting to enter the Aquaman stars home. Armed… Read more »
FORMER president and all round malignant tumour Donald Trump has a famous cameo in Home Alone 2 but in light of all actions that have made him infamous and horrible to look at the Christmas movie will now only air with Trump digitally removed from the Culkin classic. But just what uncontroversial, scandal-free, family friendly… Read more »
PLAINTIVE piano soundtrack and emotionally manipulative edits building to a crescendo with a string quartet – all elements US broadcaster ABC say will delight sick and twisted viewers rubber necking on the shooting which resulted in the death of cinematographer Halyna Hutchins. “Ooh, honey look it’s like a movie trailer,” one enthusiastic viewer said of… Read more »
DENIS Villeneuve has announced that a sequel to his sci-fi epic Dune has been officially greenlit, which has assured Waterford man Alan Henning that he should keep schtum about how he felt the first movie was overlong, boring and at times laughably up it’s own hole. “The critics are calling Dune the best sci-fi movie… Read more »
WHILE some people are struggling to absorb the news that in a new run of DC Comics, Superman Jon Kent, the son of Clark Kent is to come out as bisexual, others are just wondering what this means for Superman administered orgasms. For some it is a stretch too far for their imagination to accept… Read more »
BANGING angrily on the outside of the Russian spacecraft carrying the crew which beat out the Mission Impossible actor to become the first filmmakers to make a movie in space, a livid Tom Cruise has demanded he is immediately given a part in their space-set movie. “Show me the movie!” screamed Cruise, maintaining his remarkable… Read more »