Always 45 Minutes Left In Movie, Finds Report

SCIENTISTS are no closer to understanding how there’s always 45 minutes left in whatever movie you’re watching every time you check the progress bar, regardless of how long the movie is overall, or your thoughts on its quality one way or the other.

“It doesn’t seem to matter whether or not you’re enjoying the movie, if you’re having a great time or if you think it’s the worst piece of crap ever committed to celluloid,” said Dr. Evan Forrester, lead researcher into the phenomenon.

“When the human brain naturally finds itself restlessly thinking ‘how fucking long is left in this thing’, it will always be in the ’45 minutes remaining mark’, at which point we are forced to decide whether or not to plough on, or just go to bed and save the rest for tomorrow night”.

Dr. Forrester claims that this scenario is nothing new to movie watching, and dates back as far as checking the whirring counter thing on old VHS machines, if you’d remembered to reset it before pressing play, of course.

He also went on to add that those who choose to abandon their movie-watching because there’s 45 minutes left will invariably find themselves watching well over an hour of shite on YouTube before bed, never once complaining about how tired or bored they are.