WORRYING scenes continue to play themselves out across America as they have tragically fail to flatten the curve of stupidity currently rife throughout a number of states. Casually carrying a rocket launcher over their shoulder as is their right as an American under the 2nd amendment, MAGA hat wearing, confederate flag waving Americans continue to… Read more »
EAGER to re-open the world’s greatest economy despite mounting evidence that the Coronavirus pandemic has yet to reach its peak, the US government has asked its citizens to ‘assess the value’ of the elderly and ill in their communities. “Your grandmom might give you, what, ten dollars on your birthday?” asked a spokesperson for the… Read more »
HAVING exhausted his final scapegoat to blame for his own mishandling of the US Covid-19 outbreak in the shape of the WHO, President Trump moved onto those US citizens ‘unpatriotic’ enough to just lay down and die from Covid-19 potentially causing harm to the most important person in all of this; Donald Trump. “I have… Read more »
A ROUSING, confetti-strewn Covid-19 briefing by President Donald Trump at the White House yesterday was capped off with a host of surprise guest virus experts, including Grammy-award winning singer and actor Meat Loaf, and Gary Busey. The announcements capped off a spectacular press corp meeting, where the President declared ‘war on the germs’ and treated… Read more »
THE USA is today breathing a sigh of relief, after the presidential campaign of the notorious Bernie Sanders finally came to a halt, ending months of fear that the country would be placed under the rule of a man who wanted everyone to have access to a decent standard of healthcare. “It’s over, it’s finally… Read more »
PROOF that there a virus with the capacity to cause harm all over the world is continuing to wreak havoc arrived yet again with Donald Trump’s latest press conference, during which the virus again criticised the World Health Organisation and threatened to pull US funding from the organisation. Not content with just the one indignant… Read more »
IN A LAST ditch effort to flatten the Covid-19 curve now devastating the US, President Donald Trump has ordered over 3,000 televangelists to be deployed over the worst hit states tomorrow morning to begin widespread praying. With an estimated cost of $45 billion, each televangelist will be flown over epicentres where they will then parachute… Read more »
IN much-needed good news for the USA, President Donald Trump announced yesterday that he is to impose a heavy fee on China for each and every US citizen confirmed to have contracted the Coronavirus, giving a much-needed boost to the on-the-ropes American economy. Millions of Americans had up to this point felt enormous fear and… Read more »
IN TIMES of crisis, everyday Americans living through the spread of Covid-19 are learning who their friends are. As New York officials beg the Trump administration for medical supplies and support in the hours before and after President Trump announced $100 million worth of medical supplies would be sent to various European nations, those nations… Read more »
“THEY tried to make me waste all the money on people, healthcare workers and medical supplies, but I fought for what’s important; executive pay, bonuses and wealthy businesses,” President Trump tearfully confirmed to reporters after a historic $2 trillion stimulus package was passed by the US Senate. Trump spent long portions of the latest media… Read more »