SENIOR Russian military aides issued a collective ‘holy shit’ this morning, after several thousand Ukrainian ground troops suddenly charged over the border into Russia, catching Putin’s army completely by surprise. In what is being described as ‘a classic example of the old switcheroo’, Ukraine ended months of tensions along the border and allayed fears of… Read more »
RUSSIAN topless man on horse clearly in the throes of a midlife crisis Vladimir Putin has expressed surprise at Vladimir Putin this Valentine’s Day, insisting ‘you shouldn’t have’ when opening a gift he got for himself. “You can’t expect loved ones in your life to be mind readers, sometimes you’ve just got to practice what… Read more »
THERE’S further unease and tension growing at the Ukranian border as exclusive US intelligence leaked to WWN suggests Russia is currently assembling a large scale Power Rangers robot. “As we feared it’s exactly like the one when the blue, pink, red, yellow and black fuse to create a Megazord,” White US Secretary of Defence Lloyd… Read more »
“SURE, I’m a confident guy and I have my good days with many smiles, but I can’t be Glad-imir Putin 24/7, sometimes I’m Sad-imir Putin, y’know? But those leaders, they just see Bad-imir Putin,” the words of Russian leader Vladimir Putin as he reveals for the first time the full toll the critical words from… Read more »
WITH NEWS of an agreement between Irish fishermen and the Russian government over controversial naval exercises off the southwest coast of Ireland, WWN speaks to Irish fishermen Kevin Mackay, who, along with his fishing peers, singlehandedly defused an international incident. “Ah, Yury’s not the worsht of them now in fairness, God love him. Shure I… Read more »
‘UKRAINE – could you find it on a map?’, ‘did you ever holiday in Ukraine, do you have fond childhood memories of the place?’ and ‘how many Ukrainians do you know on a personal basis?’ are just some of the questions being asked in a survey aimed at gauging the world’s interest in saving the… Read more »
US President Joe Biden has boxed off an hour this afternoon to sit down by himself in the Oval Office and loudly suck an entire pound of hard candies as he contemplates his next move when it comes to Russia’s continuing aggression against Ukraine. Biden, who every day sets a new record for being the… Read more »
RUSSIA’S Ambassador to Ireland Yury Filatov has played down concerns over their military exercises off the coast of Ireland, stating that the activity is a “non story” and are part of a regular practice plan to disable American airbases like Shannon, WWN has learned. “Seriously, don’t worry, we’re only practicing to bomb Shannon airport in… Read more »
DESPITE amassing 100,000 Russian troops on the border of Ukraine and continuing his passion project of debstabilising the West and undermining democracy everywhere, Vladimir Putin is held in high esteem by local father Eddie Kevlin who has labeled him ‘some man all the same’. “You wouldn’t mess with him though,” a chuckling Kevlin said to… Read more »
THE much anticipated summit in Geneva saw the two leaders weigh up who has done the most pernicious meddling in the affairs of other nations, with aides sadly confirming Putin and Biden could not come to an understanding. “Imagine we meddled in elections like they do? What would the world say?” scoffed Biden, leader of… Read more »