Tag: relationships

No, Martin! Now’s Not The Time To Be Texting Your Ex-Fucking-Girlfriend!

THE suffocating blanket of dread placed over just about everyone during this Covid-19 pandemic has lead many people to reassess their careers, lives, how they treat loved ones and material things they laughably once considered important. However, Martin, it’s now not the time, actually it’s just about the most selfish and self-serving time to use… Read more »

Local Mother Preferred Your Last Boyfriend

NOT MEANING to stir the pot or stick her oar in where it’s not wanted, one Waterford mother has remarked under her breath that, if you want her opinion she can never understand why you let a nice decent fella like Mark slip through your fingers. WWN has learned that these comments, judged to be… Read more »

Husband Stockpiling Comeback Arguments In His Head

FOLLOWING a heated argument over constantly putting side plates on top of dinner plates in the press, local husband Jamie Kehoe vowed to take revenge on his wife’s latest jibe, by carefully compiling a series of comeback arguments in his head for future reference. “Well, at least I don’t leave the shower looking like a hairdresser’s floor,”… Read more »

So Your Fiancé Wants To Keep Her Surname

PLANNING a wedding? Forget flowers, cakes and cocktail sausages, what you need to sort out promptly is whether or not your bride-to-be intends to take your name after you’re married. If she is, then congrats, buddy. We wish you a lifetime of happiness. If not… you may want to consider your options… 1) Call off… Read more »

How To Break It To Martin And Eimear That They’re Not A ‘Power Couple’

ALL across Ireland, groups of friends are suffering needlessly through their acquaintance with insufferable couples who post their every move on Facebook and Instagram as if they’re some form of ‘power couple’. To this, we say suffer no more! The phenomenon of the ‘Power Couple’ has grown in recent years, from genuinely powerful and successful celebrity… Read more »

Local Boyfriend Taking Ages To Get Ready

LONG SUFFERING girlfriend Andrea Hines is having her patience sorely tested this evening by her boyfriend Ciaran Connell, WWN can reveal. Ciaran’s habit of uttering the phrase ‘yeah, be ready in five minutes’ is putting the couple at risk of starting their weekend off with an argument as Hines fears a repeat of a recent… Read more »

Is James Suddenly Attractive Now He Has A Girlfriend? We Investigate

REPORTS coming into WWN’s sister site Gash are speculating on the relative attractiveness of James now that another woman has deemed him worth the effort and has begun a relationship with him. The phenomenon of men previously discounted suddenly becoming attractive when someone else takes an interest has been debated for decades but James’ recent… Read more »