HAVE you grown tired of waiting for the evening’s news round up to find out what unfathomable dysfunction is eating away at the Irish health service like a parasite? Would you like to take a stab at coming up with your own HSE headline which is depressingly predictable and hugely damaging to patients? Now you… Read more »
A NEW report into hospital waiting times has revealed that where you live in Ireland can determine how soon you are treated, kind of, WWN reports. The report, which pinpoints blackspot areas across the 26 counties, has left very little areas untouched, forcing the HSE to subsequently release areas where hospital waiting lists are not… Read more »
CONDOLENSES have flooded in from around the country after the untimely death of HSE CEO Paul Reid who was crushed in a workplace accident earlier today, WWN has learned. It is understood Mr Reid was collecting his annual pay packet today but underestimated exactly how much money was in it before struggling to take home… Read more »
THUS FAR huge numbers of Covid-19 cases attributed to the Omicron variant has not resulted in the HSE being overwhelmed by the virus with health service thankfully just subjected to the normal chaos and breakdown it frequently enters. “Oh no relax, that mentally fragile nurse who’s crying and begging for help isn’t doing it due… Read more »
FOLLOWING complaints up and down the country regarding the booking of booster jabs for the over 50s, the HSE has since apologised for the mix up, citing a lack of communication as to how to register for the jab. “We simply forgot to mention that the machine for booking the booster jab is located in… Read more »
HANDING Ireland’s Chief Medical Officer an oversized model of an antigen test, psychologist Dr. Laura Wardly delicately attempted to get down to the root of Tony Holohan’s irrational hatred of the once frowned rapid test, which is now suddenly being rolled out against his advice by the Irish government, some 12 months too late. “Okay,… Read more »
WITH WELL publicised waiting lists stretching on for longer than the Lord of the Rings Directors Cut DVD boxset, the news that Sláintecare executive director Laura Magahy has stepped down has been met with broad and unconvincing smiles as well as trembling thumbs ups indicating everything is perfectly fine. While a progress report cited significant… Read more »
RECENT attacks carried out by the Russian backed Darkside and Evil Corp hacking groups has given rise to suspicions that Putin’s FSB may be responsible for the recent HSE ransomware hack which might explain why an irate and bare-chested Micheál Martin is in the middle of recording a call out video to the Russian leader…. Read more »
FEARS that the onslaught of Covid-19 may have irreparably changed the environment of Irish hospitals were eased today, as A&E departments around the country recorded the highest number of patients on trolleys in over six months. Pastoral scenes of overcrowding were evident in hospitals in Limerick, Cork, Mullingar and many more, sparking fresh hopes of… Read more »
THE Covid-19 contact tracing app may only have been live for a few days, but already people are discovering fun ways to grind out rewards quicker than simply wandering around hoping to get lucky! With over one million downloads making it the fastest-downloaded Irish app since the Farmers Journal App, the Covid-19 tracker app is… Read more »