Nature Is Healing: 221 Patients Return To Hospital Trolleys

FEARS that the onslaught of Covid-19 may have irreparably changed the environment of Irish hospitals were eased today, as A&E departments around the country recorded the highest number of patients on trolleys in over six months.

Pastoral scenes of overcrowding were evident in hospitals in Limerick, Cork, Mullingar and many more, sparking fresh hopes of a return to the old days when patients lying on trolleys in corridors was a common sight throughout Ireland.

“221 cases yesterday – a far cry from the glory days of 2019 where we have upwards of 600 cases some days, but nevertheless, a pleasing sign that our hospitals are returning to their origins” said one trolleywatcher, lying on a roof across from Waterford General with a big pair of binoculars and a flask of tea.

Hospital watchers had shown dismay earlier in the year when Covid-19 emptied Irish hospitals, sparking fears that someone in government might take the opportunity to reform waiting lists and the HSE itself, leading to a ‘day one’ restart and an end to patients waiting miserably on trolleys.

However, it now seems that not only is the broken system managing to heal itself, it may heal itself to the point where it’s even more broken than ever before.

“I’m excited as to what the combination of flu season, Covid, and mismanagement will bring over the coming months” said our trolley enthusiast.

“The government have downplayed the idea that they’re ‘sleepwalking into disaster’, so that’s normally a sign that they’re sleepwalking into disaster. Could this be the year we see over 1,000 patients on trolleys day after day? I wouldn’t bet against it”.