GP Cancels Second Holiday Home After News Pharmacists Can Prescribe Medicines

WITH the prescription fee gravy train finally slowing for local general practices, local doctor David Sherlock has had to cancel the purchase of a second holiday home in Malta, WWN has learned.

“We had a really good run in fairness… like really good,” Dr. Sherlock said of a cunning protocol which forced recurring patients to fork out a lucrative administration fee every 3 or 6 months for getting a repeat prescription, as if medicine wasn’t expensive enough.

“We’ll have to bang up those visitation fees now too,” he muttered to himself, looking at his watch and hurrying his current sitting in front of him through their symptoms, “yeah, yeah, pain in the back, it’s sciatica or some shit, here, piss off and take some pain relief so I can squeeze in another 80 euro appointment in before lunch – time’s money, grandma”.

Health Minister Stephen Donnelly later clarified the prescription proposals would only cover just eight common conditions, before reassuring GPs it won’t affect doctors that much, it’s just to alleviate pressure on waiting lists and not on their pockets.

“Oh, thank God; I thought they would go down the rest of the world route where fully trained pharmacists can issue prescriptions for a wide range of ailments,” Dr. Sherlock added after becoming clear on the news, before shouting out to his receptionist, “Tina! Ramp up those cancellation fees too – the heated infinity pool extension ain’t gonna pay for itself!”

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