Woman Enters ‘Third State Beyond Life And Death’ After Sculling Two Bottles Of Rosé Last Night

SCIENTISTS have descended to a Waterford city home this morning to study local woman Lisa Raynard who has apparently entered a ‘third state’ beyond life and death following a boozy lunch with the girlos yesterday afternoon.

While sounding like the stuff of fantasy, scientists studying the 33-year-old on her couch confirmed she has broken the barrier beyond life and death proving recent studies published last week proving there is an alternative state of being.

“Her cells and vital organs are technically alive but mentally she’s unresponsive to such a degree that she could be perceived as being beyond death,” one scientist pointed out, opening one of her eyes and shining a flashlight into it with very little response.

The daughter of two reportedly headed out for ‘early ones’ yesterday afternoon to a local wine bar where she casually sipped on glasses of wine topped up by staff to the tune of 12 euros per glass, unaware some 9 glasses later of the time, where she was or how she consumed so much alcohol in such a short period of time.

“We’re not sure if it was the wine or the bill itself that triggered her current state, but it’s very interesting to watch all the same,” said another scientist, lifting Raynards lifeless arm up into the air before letting go, dropping it with a thud.

However, Raynard’s brainwaves later began to stabilise after being administered a bottle of Lucozade Sport and some meanies.