Tag: alcohol

Off-Licence Shelves Lay Empty With 4 Mile Queues Following Threat To Curb Hours

REMINISCENT of the first initial lockdown which saw people hoarding toilet roll ahead of a nationwide lockdown, hundreds of thousands of panicked consumers took to their local off-licences this week as the government openly contemplated reducing hours in some kind of deranged social experiment. “Yeah great idea, assholes,” remarked 2,356th in the queue for Maddigans… Read more »

Barman Still Sour As Fuck As Pubs Reopen

PUNTERS at the Cattle & Stick bar in Waterford who were expecting a warm welcome from landlord Jimmy Devlan after 6 months away were stunned to find that the 54-year-old publican is just as perpetually pissed-off as he ever was, WWN can report. Like the vast majority of pubs around Ireland, the Cattle & Stick… Read more »

These Are The 126 Pubs Closed For Flouting Covid Guidelines, So You Know They’re Good For A Session

AS MANY as 126 pubs have been sanctioned by authorities for flouting Covid-19 related restrictions, prompting a shocked and appalled Irish public to carefully make a note of the pubs in question with a future session in mind. Brazen pubs eagerly opening in defiance rules and guidelines are reasonably assumed to be the exact sort… Read more »

The Pros & Cons Of Keeping Pubs Closed

THE TAOISEACH made the reluctant decision to delay the reopening of pubs for at least another 3 weeks, prompting auld lads at the end of bars to spontaneously combust from blind rage. But with Covid-19 cases on the rise here and elsewhere, many believe there are only easy, simple and obvious measures to put in… Read more »

‘Not A Mad One’ Turns Into Mad One

DESPITE the best intentions of all involved, a Waterford BBQ/get-together that had been promised to ‘not be a mad one’ turned out, in actual fact, to be a mad one in the late hours of yesterday evening. Here’s how the grave turn of events played out in the O’Driscoll household yesterday. 2PM: Buoyed by the… Read more »