Dublin’s Top 5 Gangsters With Funny Names
GIVING hardened criminals a quirky nickname is nothing new; in fact, the practice spans all the way back to the 1920s when London was terrorised by James “The Wrong ‘un” Smyth, so named because he was indeed quite a wrong ‘un.
The trend spread to Dublin, and these days you can’t be a crimelord worth your salt without a curiously charming crime nickname. Here’s some of our favourites!
1) Micky ‘The Swede’ Gallagher
Despite having never actually been to Sweden, this still-at-large hitman earned his comical moniker after a series of murders outside Ikea. Gallagher would lure rivals to the underground carpark by false pretences, knife them, and then go get a fried breakfast for under a fiver.
2) Jack ‘The Pooh’ Sweeney
Sweeney may be one of the most vicious thugs this country has ever produced, but he sure does love his honey. After knifing a man in the throat during a 2-year stretch in Mountjoy just because he used the last of Sweeney’s Boyne Valley, the name stuck. A lot like Pooh’s head in a honey jar, right?
3) Seamus ‘Bill Clinton’ O’Reilly
O’Reilly was renowned as one of the key players in the Dublin drugs scene until his untimely death by bullet overdose in 2005. He also once had sexual relations with a young woman and came all over her dress, hence the nickname.
4) Graham ‘Rastamouse’ Greene
Stuck for a nickname for this ruthless drug pusher in 2009, a tabloid journalist just went with the first thing he could see; in this instance, an episode of popular kids animation Rastamouse. Nobody, not even Greene, knew why he had been christened Rastamouse, but everyone just went with it.
5) Fintan ‘Poop emoji’ Hanlon
The most recent addition to this list, reports vary as to how feared hardman Hanlon got the name ‘poop emoji’. We’re just glad that the media latches on to nicknames like this, as it gives our most feared criminals an otherworldly, almost comical sheen that helps us ignore the, y’know, killing and drug dealing and community destroying and crime and all that.