Parents Urged To Monitor Kids Internet Use If They Want To Know Where All The Good Porn Is

WITH almost every teenager in the country owning their very own smartphone with numerous social media apps at their disposal, there’s never been a greater risk of them accessing debasing, depraved pornography; something that parents should be acutely aware of if they’re bored of the same old smut and need to find something racier. A… Read more »

Local Man Wears Hats Now

ALTHOUGH they initially dismissed the wearing of hats as a passing fad or a byproduct of the cold weather, friends of one local Waterford man are today coming to terms with the fact that their pal wears hats now, and there’s nothing they can do about it. Sean Carolan, 36, was never known to friends… Read more »

“Squatters’ Rights” Shouts Kenny As He Barricades Himself Into Taoiseach’s Office

RACING through the corridors of Leinster House pursued on foot by Simon Coveney and Leo Varadkar, Enda Kenny reached the Taoiseach’s office and immediately declared “squatters’ rights” at the top of his lungs as he tried to close the door behind him. The young ministers had attempted to discuss Kenny’s leadership intentions with him, in… Read more »

Plea To Double Licence Fee Voted Funniest Comedy RTÉ Has Ever Produced

IRISH audiences today wiped the tears of laughter from their eyes for long enough to declare that the new director general of RTÉ’s statement that the licence fee should be doubled was without doubt ‘the funniest thing ever produced’ by the national broadcaster. Speaking on Radio One’s Today With €290,000-a-year Sean O’Rourke, €250,000-a-year DG Dee Forbes… Read more »

“Have Some Red iPhones, You Gullible Fools”

AN ASTOUNDING innovation at Apple has led to the company’s CEO announcing that he is proud to offer consumers a revolutionary new product that appeals to your desire to have a visual representation of how charitable and giving you are, WWN can confirm. “Have some red iPhones for the affordable price of whatever we’re saying… Read more »