Adults Are Just Children In Bigger Bodies, Finds Report

A SHOCKING new report published by the Massachusetts Institute of Technology has found that adult human beings are actually just children living inside bigger bodies, forcing scientists to rethink everything they knew about the nature on mankind. Researchers at MIT studied over 10 thousand people over a period of 50 years, making this one of… Read more »

Happiness Directly Linked To Whether Group Of Millionaires Beat Other Millionaires

RESEARCH coming into WWN Sport this morning confirms there is overwhelming evidence that a growing number of people’s happiness is directly linked to whether or not one group of millionaires can triumph over a number of near indecipherable groups of millionaires. The millionaire’d groups, largely hailing from a variety of nations but located in a… Read more »

Submit Your Questions To The Pope

WE HAVE an amazing opportunity for our readers as WWN and WWN alone will be able to personally hand over your questions to Pope Francis when he visits Ireland later this month. What do you want to know? What question of great importance can the leader of the Catholic Church answer for you, a humble… Read more »

‘G-Spot Denial’ Scientists Criticised By Women

AN EVER growing collective of like-minded scientists are sharing their expertise and knowledge to warn the world of a dangerous conspiracy among the female population to falsely state the existence of the ‘G-Spot’, something women have denied. Claiming ‘no evidence’ and a left-leaning liberal conspiracy, the all-male group of scientists have confirmed that if their… Read more »

Mourinho To Practice Latest Meltdown In Front Of Mirror

NOTING the ever dwindling impact of his attempts to place the blame on others for his own failings as a manager, Jose Mourinho will practice his next meltdown/rant/lambasting of a 16-year-old youth team player in front of the mirror. Spending much of the summer’s pre-season before the start of the Premier League giving out about… Read more »

Apple Billionaire Granny Smith Dies, Age 91

Granny Smith, the famed Apple magnate whose fortune is valued at €193 billion has died at the age of 91. Georgia Smith was of course more affectionately known as Granny Smith by the rivals she ruthlessly wiped out in the incredibly bloody ‘Apple Wars’ feud of the 1950s. Her resulting victory in the conflict carved… Read more »

Local Dickhead Spends 45 Minutes Choosing Craft Beer

A LOCAL Dublin dickhead with a penchant for only the finest, most ludicrously named craft beers has been in his local off licence agonising over which craft beers to place in his basket for nearly 45 minutes, WWN can exclusively reveal. 28-year-old Gary Penrose’s personality and self of self worth is so closely wrapped up… Read more »

‘Grossly Unfair’ For British Soldiers Who Murdered People, To Face Charges For Murder

SENIOR BRITISH military officials past and present have come forward once again to confirm that it would be just terribly unfair altogether if any British soldiers, who murdered 14 innocent civilians in the 1972 Bloody Sunday massacre, were to be held to account and face charges ranging from ‘murder’ all the way up to ‘murder’…. Read more »