A WATERFORD moggy named Jessy has scooped the top prize at this year’s National Cat’s Arse competition, beating out stiff competition from all across the country with a pure-white balloon knot of an arse that judges described as ‘mesmerisingly spotless’. Dylan Morris, owner of the 4-year-old Bombay Black kitty, explained to WWN’s sports correspondent the… Read more »
A FIENDISH UK based cat who’s evil, like all cats, knows no bounds has admitted to purposefully catching the Covid-19 virus in a bid to kill off its owner who has slavishly served the cat’s every whim for the last 6 years. “Meow!” explained grey tabby Merlin, as the first UK based pet to contract… Read more »
ANIMAL experts have noticed disturbing signs that suggest the world’s cats are somehow becoming ‘more aware’ of the spike in mortality rates thanks to Covid-19, and are eagerly awaiting making a feast of your remains after you die. “It’s like they can smell the death in the air” said feline expert Augustus O’Flynn, speaking from… Read more »
A STUNNED Waterford man is still trying to come to terms with the genuine existence of the movie version of Broadway musical ‘Cats’ after seeing the film listed in the foyer of his local cinema. “Jess, I thought that trailer you showed me was a piss take,” Graham Lane said turning to his girlfriend as… Read more »
DOGS worldwide are today tucking into delicious chocolate treats for the very first time, after the long-held belief that it would make them sick was revealed to be an elaborate prank propagated by sneaky bastard cats. “You mean to tell me I could have been eating this my whole life?” asked one King Charles Spaniel,… Read more »
WWN would like to congratulate Waterford family the McAirdles on their new pet kitty cat, which they have acquired by simply moving into a house in a neighbourhood where someone else owns a cat. The McAirdle’s moved to Dungarvan earlier this year, and although they have no love for cats nor indeed any intention to get… Read more »
SOME people adore dogs, some adore cats but no one adores both – it’s impossible and that’s just basic science. Answer these simple questions and grant yourself the serene pleasure of scientifically complex scientific proof you are either a dog or a cat person. Q: Do you like to play fetch? A: Yes. B: No…. Read more »
DESPITE the best efforts of cat owners, it has been confirmed that your cat has zero interest about how your day went. While many cat owners return home from a hard day at the office to regale their pets with tales of how much of a bitch Sharon in accounts is, it is believed cats… Read more »