Parents Ring Tusla On Themselves In Bid To Get Five Minutes Peace

CHILD protection agency Tusla have pleaded with parents to stop phoning in anonymous tips about themselves in a ruse to have their children taken away for an afternoon which they then spend with their feet up, WWN can report.

It’s believed that stressed mums and dads have reached their limits with their horrible kids and with no grandparents or uncles and aunts willing to take them for an afternoon, they’ve turned to Tusla for a scheme that many are calling ‘absolute genius’.

“We’ll get a call saying ‘oh, I think the Murphy family in number 73 are beating their kids, can you go check it out’ and when we go to take the kids away for questioning, the Dad’s voice at the door will be the same one we heard on the phone,” said a spokesperson for Tusla, making an urgent plea to Ireland to knock this crap off.

“They know that we’ll take the kids in for an interview and that’ll give them a couple of hours to get a bit of work done or even have a daytime ride, the kids will state there’s no such abuse occurring and they’ll be back by night. As a parent myself, I must admit that I could do with a few hours away from the little feckers at times, but please, Tusla are stretched to breaking point as it is”.

Interviews with kids that have been ‘Tusla’d’ for an afternoon have revealed that most youngsters are perfectly OK with being away from their dose parents for an evening, and that they also get a McDonalds out of it so it’s win-win.