Jobs Boost As Council To Hire 250 New Hole-Staring Experts

GOOD news on the jobs front this morning; local county councils are to roll out dozens of hole-staring positions to suitable applicants across the country, with as many as 250 jobs set to come on-stream by 2019.

Although once a valid and lucrative career path, the role of ‘man staring into hole’ has diminished in recent years following the economic downturn when local authorities were forced to curtail the amount of money they were spending on people gazing into an opening in the ground.

With money starting to flow into local projects again, county council officials were quick to advertise new hole-gawking vacancies, with the first of the posts expected to be filled as early as this summer.

“Yep, we’re getting 10 new hole-staring experts in July,” said Seamus Dargan, head of planning for Waterford County Council.

“With the extra manpower, we should be able to spend our entire budget this year. That was a problem we had last year; we didn’t use up our allotted cash, so of course we had it cut back this year. They won’t give it to you if you don’t spend it! So we’ll have our 10 new staff go and spend a few hours every day looking into a hole; some are qualified to just lean on a shovel, but some can also shake their heads and drink tea.”

Although the positions for hole-looking are expected to be snapped up quickly, the council have no plans to employ more people in the ‘filling up holes and leaving the road as good as new’ department.