Empty Dáil Session On Tuam Babies Probably Not Symbolic Of Anything

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THE PUBLIC HAS been told not to read into the fact Minister for Children, Katherine Zappone delivered remarks on the Commission of Investigation’s discovery of human remains in Tuam to an empty Dáil this morning, with experts confirming it is not symbolic of an insidious malaise which periodically sets into Irish society, thus creating the perfect circumstances for scandals to excel and flourish.

Those knowledgeable on political discourse and Irish history admitted that while there was a temptation to see this morning’s discussion as symbolic of a sometimes malignant apathy at the heart of Irish society, it simply wasn’t true.

“The leader of the opposition isn’t there because he’s at some talk on Brexit, who knows where the government is, but it would be wrong to suggest an empty Dáil is like some metaphorical emptiness and apathy we all possess once speeches are made, fists are shaken and the cameras turn away,” explained Ireland expert John Gobbin.

“Now, I know you might be thinking ‘God, the fact no one turned up to talk about it sure says a lot about Ireland’, but you’d be very wrong, it is no way a visual representation of our collective failure as a Nation and a society, it’s just an average day in the Dáil,” added Gobbin, “that’s just the sort of talk from people who want us to feel guilty about everything that happens that our society is in some way complicit in”.

The small collection of TDs amongst the empty seats of a chamber which in recent years heard testimony of how shocked everyone was by child abuse carried out by Catholic priests, was once again filled with orations that sounded suitably shocked and heartbroken, however, it would be inappropriate to suggest it is symbolic in any way.

“Ah come off it, TDs jobs aren’t only about turning up to the Dáil to be seen, they’re in Oireachtas Committee meetings. What, you want the country to drop what it’s doing and prioritise getting to the bottom of the horrors carried out in mother and baby homes across the country. Eh, heard of a little thing called the recovery? It doesn’t keep itself going, we’ve got to get our priorities straight, we can’t do both,” added someone you wouldn’t want to be friends with.

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