New Crop Of Kardashians Nearly Ready To Hatch


BIOLOGISTS at the Kardashian body-hive in California have apologised for their recent delays and set-backs, but have made assurances that the new crop of Kardashian’s will be ready to hatch by Q3, 2016.

The latest litter of sultry round-bottomed sirens are expected to shore up the public’s waning interest in the Kardashian family, following too many years of Kim, Khloe and Kourtney and poor levels of heed in Kylie and Kendall.

The model K2000 Kardashian’s due in September are said to be sexier, shapelier, and more empowered than any crop thus far. Scientists working at the 1,000 acre genetic factory have expressed their delight in their work, and are looking forward to the new Kardashians hitting the airwaves soon after they emerge from their amniotic slime pods.

“This one, we call Krystal” said one scientist, wiping moisture from a pulsating egg sac to allow us to see inside.

“Everything is here, the pout is already formed, the hand is curling into a claw suitable for holding a mobile phone, and the E! reality series is signed off already. Another month or two in the sac, and we’ll unleash her on the public”.

There has been concern lately that the new batch of Kardashians may be the first to possess self-awareness, although scientists have assured everyone that they’ll be as clueless as the rest of them.