Super Trawler Nets Inishmore

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RESIDENTS of the island of Inishmore have been urged to remain vigilant after the entire island has been dragged 3oo miles further out to sea after being caught in the net of the second biggest fishing trawler on the planet, the Margiris.

Local fishermen were already furious at the presence of the trawler, which further calls into question EU fishing regulations as there are fears the Margiris’s’ huge capacity could see fish stocks seriously depleted.

Over 900 people on Inishmore, including tourists, were awoken to new surroundings this morning following the accidental catch by the fishing vessel, leaving them now situated to the north east of the country, off the Donegal coast.

“I knew something was wrong when I couldn’t see the mainland when I woke up,” recalled islander Paddy O’Shoeamhain. “It was a lot colder and we had no mobile reception.”

It wasn’t until 10am this morning that residents noticed a large wake behind the island, as if it was being dragged along by an unknown force at speed.

Several water skiers took advantage of the free ride by attaching ropes to the shoreline.

“It was a weird sight to see alright,” said fisherman Tommy Kent. “The water skiers on the island loved it now, but everyone else was pretty pissed off about the whole thing because they were left without internet. Very bad reception up here now.”

Following a search and rescue mission, the island was later located 300 miles off the northeast coast of Donegal, where it is due to stay until a solution is met.

It is understood the trawler’s giant nets snagged the island at around 5am this morning, inadvertently dragging it to its current location; 500 miles from its original position. The skipper of the controversial Lithuanian-owned fishing trawler apologised for the mishap, much to the disgust of fishing protesters on the mainland.

“This ship not only take’s all fish, now island too,” stated Demitri Slovack, a 3-euro-per-hour labourer for an Irish owned fishing trawler in Cork. “I did not come here in the back of a truck for two months for some dirty foreigners to take my job.”

Inishmore is expected to remain at its current point until the new year.

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