Period Protest Finishes Up For 3 To 4 Weeks


ENDA Kenny has today expressed relief that a protest by women, in which tweets describing their menstruation were sent to the Taoiseach’s Twitter account, has wrapped up for the next 23 days or so.

Spearheaded by comedian Grainne Maguire and aimed at highlighting the harsh abortion laws and lack of human rights for women in Ireland, the Twitter protest garnered attention from many major news outlets across the world, including the BBC and the New York Post.

“If Enda Kenny and his government want to have so much say about my body, then I’ll let them know all about it, ” said one protester, tweeting a description of her flow to the Taoiseach.

Utilising a stance that has stood him in good stead as a man for 64 years, Mr. Kenny chose to ignore the protest, along with any mention of periods, menstruation, vaginas or tampons.

Having weathered the period storm for a full week, the Taoiseach today expressed relief that it was all over “for another while at least”.

“That was a bad one alright,” said Mr. Kenny, who just wants a bit of peace and quiet.

“You could tell they were upset alright, but it’s best not to get involved when they’re like that. Just let it pass, you’ll only make trouble for yourself if you try and argue with them. Thank fuck it’s all over now for three or four weeks, it’ll give my head a rest”.

In a bid to prevent a similar protest next month, Mr. Kenny has announced that a special once-off package containing a hot water bottle and a Galaxy Ripple will be sent to every woman in Ireland.