Local Male Finally Admits It’s A Man Bag

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FOLLOWING years of denial, a Dublin lad has finally come clean and admitted that the man bag he carries around with him everywhere is in fact a man bag; not a satchel, not a carry-all, a genuine ‘man bag’.

Mal Brennan, 25, faced ridicule from his mates when he was first spotted in town with his man bag in 2011.

The Phibsboro native argued that the bag was not in fact a man bag, but instead “just something to keep his stuff in”. This was followed by years of Brennan extolling the practical applications of carrying a bag, from somewhere to keep recently purchased items to how it was “the handiest way to carry the iPad into town”, even though he didn’t own an iPad at the time.

Finally, after running out of alternative names for what the bag was and unable to deny the fact that he just carries around because he thinks it looks cool, Brennan sank to his knees and emotionally confessed that yes, it’s a man bag.

“It’s a man bag! A man bag!” screamed Brennan, surrounded by his mates who were just pissing themselves laughing.

“I can’t hide it any more! I can’t pretend that it’s normal for a man to carry a bag, or argue that Indiana Jones carried one all the time. It’s a man bag, and it’s usually empty half the time, except for my wallet and half a pack of Rennie”.

Brennan will now devote his time to helping other man bag owners who are living a life of denial.

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