Man Who Can’t Go At Urinal Suffers Kidney Failure Waiting For Stall

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A COUNTY Leitrim man was admitted to A & E last night with a suspected case of kidney failure, after refusing to urinate at the urinals while on a night out.

Cathal Brennan, had been socialising with his friends in Carrick-On-Shannon when after four pints he felt the need to relieve himself.

Brennan, a renowned urinalophobe, opted as usual to wait for a stall to become free rather than stand shoulder-to-shoulder with a row of strangers as they pissed into a trough.

Unfortunately for the 28-year-old, the one available stall was occupied by an inebriated local who had passed out, leaving Brennan to wait in agony while steadfastly refusing to use the urinal.

After more than an hour, friends of Brennan checked the gents to see if he was alright, only to find him slumped on the floor. He was rushed to Cavan A & E, where he was diagnosed with kidney failure.

“This is quite common in young men who ‘can’t go’ at a urinal,” said Dr. Raheem Magee, chief urologist at Cavan General.

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“The problem is psychological in nature, so no matter how much you need to go, you stand at a urinal and your urethra just clamps shut. Mr. Brennan was lucky to get to us in time, and we were able to insert a catheter before the kidneys suffered permanent damage. In future, we would advise him to nip into the disabled toilets instead of waiting on the stalls to be free”.

Last night’s incident is the latest in a long line of urinalophobic emergencies among young men, and brings to mind the 2011 tragedy where 9 young men died while on a bus trip to Oxegen, after they were unable to take a leak in the hedges when the bus pulled over because everyone was looking at them.

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