Trump Blasts New Book Over Lack Of Pictures


CURRENT United States president Donald Trump has slammed an incendiary new book detailing his first year in the White House for containing little to no photographs, pending a full review when someone reads the rest of it to him.

“Fire & Fury” by journalist Michael Wolff paints a chaotic picture of life in the White House under Trump, featuring a rotating roster of fired staff, little to no leadership skills from Trump himself, and allegations that Trump’s kids Ivanka, Eric and Donald Jnr. are “fucking morons”.

Having thumbed through a copy without finding a few pages of full-colour photographs in the middle, Trump threw his advance copy of Fire & Fury in the bin, claiming that it’s “too much like a book” for anyone to expect him to read it.

“Donald, well, Donald doesn’t like anything more than a few paragraphs” said one beleaguered staffer, crossing out everything in the book that was uncomplimentary to Trump.

“Luckily, that’s all that will be left when I’m finished here. There’s a lot of people that claim this book will be the wedge that shatters Trump’s support across the country, when they read about the fucking mess that goes on here every day. But we’re not really worried about that; it’s not like many of these people read to begin with”.

Meanwhile, Republican supporters are being urged to bring every copy of the book they find to large, public burnings, along with any other book they disagree with.

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