GOVERNMENT ministers confirmed they will respond to constituents’ panicked emails about imminent evictions as soon as they return from their St Patrick’s Day trade missions if you could please stopping bothering them. “I’m to be kicked out on April 1st and the county council said it has not been authorised to buy my landlord’s property… Read more »
STAFF at the Chateau Marmont hotel in LA have begun a massive clean-up operation after a late-night sex and drugs fueled party took place in The Banshees of Inisherin’s star Jenny the donkey’s hotel room, WWN reports. Animal control officers were seen leading out ‘buckled mares’ barely able to walk from the hotel, along with… Read more »
THE SMILES of victorious Oscar winners representing Everything Everywhere All At Once have been short lived after word reached them that if they think they’ll be sweeping the board at the upcoming IFTAs they can ‘do one’, plunging them into unquantifiable levels of devastation. “Everyone knows the IFTAs are the big ones,” said Brendan Gleeson,… Read more »
DESPITE the Taoiseach revealing in a parliamentary party meeting with Fine Gael colleagues that there is a shortfall of 250,000 homes in Ireland, there was some good news in the form of 40,000 thousand new affordable homes on the island of Hy-Brasil. “Is it a mythical island off the west cost of Ireland that doesn’t… Read more »
MORE and more Irish people are being duped out of their inheritance due to their idiot parents getting suckered by phone and mail scams, and here’s how you can stop it: 1) Get your parents to give you your inheritance now If your mam and dad don’t give you your money now, they’re almost certainly… Read more »
THE FAI has unveiled the new badge under which will adorned the jerseys of the Irish international football teams. Gone is reference to the FAI and the shamrock makes a comeback. But what do the fans make of it? Tell us what you think:
SEVEN more TDs including the Taoiseach have officially declared that they are landlords, and have urged more of their fellow politicians to come forwards as there’s ‘nothing these bitches are going to do about it’. The revelations come after a steady stream of TDs such as Robert Troy being ‘outed’ as landlords, with many saying… Read more »
APOLOGISING profusely to the United States for murdering two American tourists before turning in their own men and promising to only torture and dismember their own innocent civilians from now on, a splinter Mexican cartel said they are really sorry. “This is so embarrassing and we can’t apologise enough for this unprofessionalism,” a spokeskiller for… Read more »
WHEN AMATEUR photographer Dylan McCartlin went out for his morning walk armed with his SLR camera he never imagined in his wildest dreams that he would capture one of the most elusive sights in Irish wildlife, according to the government at least, the Lesser Spotted Vilified Landlord. “I didn’t realise what they were at first… Read more »
