“FECK, feck, feck, feck. Feck it altogether,” steamed a normally mild-mannered Taoiseach Micheál Martin while staring at the steady increase in Covid-19 cases in Ireland these past two weeks. Having previously expressed his ‘deep concern’ for the rise in cases, the Taoiseach was now expressing his ‘what’s deeper than deep?’ deep concerns about the fact… Read more »
PRESIDENT Donald Trump was today taken to one side by his advisors and family and urged not to treat his younger brother Robert’s funeral as ‘just another campaign rally’ to no avail, although Trump has agreed to keep the bashing of his rivals to an ‘absolute minimum’ during his eulogy. “Just like the hopes of… Read more »
SPEAKING from the fiery depths of hell, the dark lord Satan has broken his silence of the ongoing bullying allegations relating to chat show legend Ellen DeGeneres, stating that the 62-year-old was by far one of his kindest and caring friends. “You guys have heard of my buddy, Hitler, right? Well, Ellen is way nicer… Read more »
RESPONDING to the 100,000 people in Belarus who took part in the country’s largest protest to date in the wake of a ‘contested election’, the EU has bravely told Belarusians ‘you are not alone’ and left it at that. Delivering the message from a Zoom call which placed the Belarusian people’s side of the conversation… Read more »
IN THE WAKE of latest video footage of blatant racism in Ireland emerging, this time involving a Chinese woman being pushed into a canal by a group of young people, WWN, as part of its Voices series gives a platform to people we really shouldn’t. This week is the turn of Angela Heaney who is… Read more »
SNOOKER legend Ronnie O’Sullivan has clinched a sixth World Title in whatever that tournament was that he competed in last week, following an 18-8 victory over the ‘supposedly very good’ Kyren Wilson at the weekend. O’Sullivan, who showed up at the Crucible because he had nothing to do at home, spent the majority of the… Read more »
PANICKED international pandemic monitors have discovered that Ireland has reached the ‘ah, sure fuck it’ stage of their pandemic response. Best exemplified by footage from Berlin D2 premises in Dublin and the decision of the head of Fáilte Ireland to swan off to Italy on holidays, Ireland is now solely relying on an Irish scientific… Read more »
JOE BIDEN’S pick to be his Vice President in the event of a November election victory, the 55-year-old American of Jamaican and Indian heritage is the talk of America. Here’s everything you need to know about United States Senator and former Attorney General of California Kamala Harris: As a woman and a person of colour,… Read more »
PLEDGING TO do his best to make the upcoming presidential election as far from ‘free and fair’ as possible, US president Donald Trump confirmed in an interview with Fox News that he plans on withholding funding from the US Postal Service as doing so will prevent millions of people’s mail-in votes from being processed and… Read more »
