Young People Told To ‘Shop Around’ For Other Countries To Live In


THE GOVERNMENT has urged people under 30 complaining about the rising cost of living to simply ‘shop around’ for a different, more affordable country, WWN can reveal.

“There’s actually some really nice countries and living standards out there if you just y’know, get off your arses and do some research,” confirmed a government spokesperson, to the growing number of disillusioned young people who feel cut off from a decent quality of life amid a housing crisis.

“And yes we’re aware people over 30 are also moaning about housing, fuel, food, childcare, health etc but technically anyone over 30 is ’90’ in emigrating years, no country would take you so you’re stuck with us,” added a spokesperson for the Department of Get The Plane To Australia Or Wherever.

Visibly worried, the government also said it ‘nearly fell off its chair’ when it heard about the recent trend of employees and job seekers asking for higher wages from businesses.

“Before you ask the company you’re lucky to work for to pay a wage which would help you afford a mortgage or even just to not skip meals, maybe have a look at what you can do to cut down on expenses; ask yourself do you really need the box room you pay €1700 a month to be warm every evening?” a spokesperson offered.

These latest remarks where made as the government unveiled their plan to help counter the cost of living which was entitled ‘And If You Don’t Like It Why Don’t You Fuck Off’.