THE 2020 presidential hopes of the Democratic party were buoyed today following the announcement of a striking new tagline for Joe Biden, in which the 77-year-old former vice-president firmly states that he’s ‘not the other guy’.
Posters bearing Biden’s image and the slogan ‘Not Trump’ began to spring up all over the US, and fans of Trump’s challenger began to sport bright blue hats with the slogan ‘Make Biden Trump, And By That We Mean Make Biden President’ on them.
“I am Trump!” stated Biden at the launch of the campaign, as aides furiously mouthed ‘no!’ from the sidelines.
“Not Trump, with the, you know. I am not Trump. Anyhow, remember that when the polls are in your hand with the figures and you have to say to yourself, who is Trump? And you look at that polling card in your hand and say ok, there’s Joe Biden, he’s Trump. So you don’t vote for Trump, you vote for… wait, no, you do vote for Trump. You vote for me. I’m Trump”.
Mr. Biden later rowed back on this statement, and added that he was going to ‘kick some serious Trump butt when the thing happens, you know, like old Ruth Ginsburg would have said, sometimes you gotta be the Trump guy and anyway, that’s another story, anyway’.
So far, Mr. Biden’s ‘I’m Not Trump’ seems to be catching on among hardcore Democratic supporters, with the rest of the country still undecided as to whether or not they want to vote for Trump, or a guy who seems unsure as to whether or not he is or is not Trump.
“I’m Trump!” shouted a jubilant Biden, as aides begged him for the love of God to please stay quiet for the next 6 weeks.