Judge Criticised After Handing Down Something Called ‘Prison Sentence’ To Violent Offender


THERE has been confusion in legal circles and an appeal for scholars of Irish law history to come forward and help explain one judge’s decision labeled as ‘odd, esoteric and possibly unenforceable’, WWN understands.

Judge William Lawrence had handed down something he referred to as a ‘prison sentence’ to a defendant found guilty of trying to stamp on an innocent man’s head like it was a balloon that needed popping, perplexing everyone from legal experts to those who read up on crimes in the papers and online.

The accused, Paul Caffins, whispered intensely with his legal counsel when the sentence was handed down but observing a contagious outbreak of shrugging of shoulders it appears no one in the court was quite sure how to proceed.

“Prison. Jail. Six years. I’m sure how I can make myself clearer,” said Judge Lawrence, who will presumably have his photo on dart boards in the offices of the DPP, Dept of Justice and Minister for Justice following his strange decision.

“Judges are known for being a eccentric. We’ve had judges talking in latin, wanting to hold a case outside during the summer ‘where it’s warm’ but this decision, whatever it is or means is beyond everyone’s comprehension,” shared one professor of law WWN spoke with.

“Now, wait, I think I have it,” added the professor now wiping inches of dust from a book on Courts and Case Law, “‘prison sentence’ here it is…the opposite of a suspended sentence…no, sorry, I’m not sure I understand the judge’s thinking here either. He is getting old in fairness”.