PREPARATIONS are underway for the changes that will be required to outward-facing Britishness such as anthems and flags ahead of the October 31st Brexit deadline, with a composer already hired to change the traditional ‘God Save The Queen’ anthem into something more along the lines of HBOs ‘Curb Your Enthusiasm’ theme.
The move comes following a report that shows almost 100% of people can no longer take the United Kingdom seriously in any way, resulting in an inadvertent humming of the popular Larry David show’s theme anytime the UK shows up on the news.
As UK prime minister Boris Johnson continues to try and negotiate for fresh negotiations with the EU, a taskforce has begun to assemble a crew of composers and designers to help usher Britain into the brave new world that awaits them on Brexit Day, 1st November.
“We’re also going to replace the Union Jack flag with just a picture of Sideshow Bob stepping on all the rakes from The Simpsons”, said a spokesperson for ‘Project Sheesh’.
“Then we get down to a country by country level; Scotland can still have the Thistle as its national Flower, but the Rose no longer suits England so we’re going to replace that with just a big plate of ham. Big Ben will be renamed Holy Shitballs. Tea will be renamed ‘foot-shoot juice’. That kind of thing”.
Prime Minister Johnson was unavailable for comment, as he was busy wondering if the face-off machine from Face Off was real and if so, could he become Angela Merkel for a little while and pretend to have struck a deal.