Londonderry Council Votes In Favour Of Dublinderry Name Change
DERRY City and Strabane District Council have passed a motion put forward by Sinn Féin to change the name of Londonderry to Dublinderry, much to the anger of many locals.
Initially, it was thought that the hardest working councillors had merely prioritised the renaming of the city to Derry over any other more infinitely more worthwhile endeavours, only for a Unionist to realise that part of the motion was written in invisible ink.
“The sly fuckers had this invisible ink which only reveals itself after 6 hours or so, they had ground me down into voting yes to the change to Derry but I took a copy of the motion home and this Dublinderry shite came up from the page out of nowhere,” confirmed a shocked Derry City councillor.
The Nationalist controlled council changed its named to the Derry City Council in 1984, but the city itself has been officially called Londonderry since 1613.
“I’ve poured my blood, sweat and tears into arguing over a name for the bulk of my time on the council, this is a huge triumph and further strengthens our ties to the Republic,” a Sinn Féin councillor told WWN, “plus on a purely semantic note the alliteration of the double-D sounds just lovely”.
Sinn Féin deny invisible ink claims, instead stating that the ‘Dublin’ part of the wording was a ‘very very very very very very light grey’.
The decision to fervently pursue the change of name is set to give a huge boost to the Foyle area of Derry, which has the highest level of unemployment in any of the 650 parliamentary constituencies in the UK, according to the most recent figures available.
“We could spend our time pushing local employment initiatives in the area, but what use is a job to people if it’s in Londonderry? It’s pointless, I know I’d much prefer to be unemployed and live in Dublinderry,” another Sinn Féin councillor remarked.